Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever. (October 22, 2010): We gay up the People’s Choice Awards and Ellen expands her empire

The Alien prequel. Script details were recently leaked then removed, by according to, the film includes some tough lesbian crew members. Does this mean they found a way to clone Private Vasquez?

Perfect Family. The new film stars Emily Deschanel and Angelique Cabral as her hot girlfriend. We’re wondering which Deschanel sister’s lesbian film will be best — Perfect Family or Zooey Deschanel‘s ceMay the most convincing gayschenel prevail!

Carol Leifer. Instead of pitching her half-hour spec script for Have a Great Day in the traditional manner, the out comic and writer is taking an entrepreneurial approach and hosting a star-studded table read for network and studio buyers and producers in LA. We suspect that Suze Orman would approve.

Revel & Riot. Founder Emy Storey, the artistic director behind Tegan and Sara‘s merchandise and album art, has created a company for and about the LGBT community. The merch is fun, political, gay-positive and fashionable, just like you.

Israel’s Dancing with the Stars. Lesbian TV journalist Gili Shem Tov will be paired with a female dancer in the upcoming season of the competition. May we nominate Rachel Maddow, Wanda Sykes and Portia Lee James DeGeneres for the U.S. version when producers are eventually (and inevitably) shamed into following suit?

The Lip Service DVD. Universal will release the Season One DVD on November 15. Can Universal also say “region-free”? We sure hope so!

Las Aparicio. The first season of the Mexican TV show wrapped this week with Julia and Mariana getting hitched. Their domestic lives may turn out to be more filled with drama than bliss, but we still give them our blessing.

Skins America. The first promo for the US version of the beloved UK series was released this week. Sex, drugs, friendship, heartache and a teen lesbian named Tea. The countdown to the Jan 2011 premiere begins!

Spirit Day. The idea (from teenager Brittany McMillan) to wear purple on Oct. 20 to honor the teenagers who have taken their own lives in recent weeks and show support for LGBT youth who still face pressure and bullying was embraced by high-profile folks like Jewel, Dixie Chicks, Ellen DeGeneres, Kathy Griffin, Jane Velez-Mitchell, Jenna Ushkowitz and the cast of Glee.

The It Gets Better Project. The project, launched by writer Dan Savage and his partner, has amassed over 2000 videos and 10 million video views. Among those 2000 videos are one by President Obama and another by Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

The Talk. Sara Gilbert and company debuted their new View-style talk show this week. It was a bit light on substance (save for the Spirit Day discussion) and a bit heavy on “cupcake.” (Ask co-host Leah Remini, she’ll explain … and she’ll try not to be “disgusting” when she does it.)

Michael Ausiello (aka “The Messenger”). The writer had some bad news for those fans who want to know if Quinn and Rachel will be hooking up on Glee. He says, “Sorry, no. If it’s any consolation, it looks like the frenemies get fairly close to first base in the new GQ.”

Piranha 3 DD. Dimension Films is rushing to get Piranha 3D in theaters by August 2011. We need more ridiculous faux lesbian eroticism, and we need it as quickly as possible!

The Young and the Restless. According to Soap Opera Digest, the CBS soap canned out actress Clementine Ford, whose last appearance will be Nov. 5. So much for the lesbian demographic!

French eBay. The company is hosting a contest in which the winners could live rent-free for a year in an apartment in Paris. The contest is open only to couples composed of “a male adult and a female adult.” Whatever happened to gay Paris?

Byron Davis. The New Jersey metal band God Forbid member made offensive remarks about Lady Gaga (“I’m still not sure if she’s a woman or not”), Lindsay Lohan (“I’d like to bang her cause she’s a lesbian. It’d be fun; she can bring her friend with her”) and Lil’ Kim (“She’s a dirty ho”). We’d like to open up a can of Otep Shamaya whupass on him. Jerk.

Homophobic security guards. A lesbian couple was asked to leave a Raleigh, NC mall by a security guard offended by their (tame) display of physical affection. Fortunately, one of the women, Caitlin Breedlove, is an experienced gay rights activist. She’s already told her story on CNN and the mall property owners have apologized and are planning sensitivity training for security staff.

The Boy Scouts of America. The father of a 9-year-old Cub Scout was forced out of a leadership role with the Scouts and ordered not to wear its uniform because of his sexual orientation. But they’ll still let him fund raise for them. Scout’s “honor”?

Maggie Gallagher. In an editorial for The New York Post, the anti-gay bigot and president of the National Organization for Marriage argues that marriage equality wouldn’t reduce LGBT teen suicides.

Ugandan Rolling Stone. The weekly newspaper published a list of 100 gay men and lesbians along with their photos and addresses, accusing them of “recruiting” children to homosexuality and calling for them to be hanged. Managing editor Giles Muhame said it was his duty as a journalist to “expose the evil in our society.” And that he did.