“Degrassi: Las Vegas” recap: Spring Break!

It’s Vegas time! It may be cold and miserable outside as I write this, but it’s sunny and springtime on Degrassi for their one-hour Spring Break themed special.

We open with Fiona trying to conduct a mock wedding ceremony for the engaged couple, Bianca and Drew, who are unhelpfully consumed by a fit of giggles. When Drew admits that he hasn’t written his vows yet and is having second thoughts about not inviting his parents, Bianca and Fiona scold him to at least pull himself together before they get to the altar.

And then the most lesbian moment of the episode happens: Tegan and Sara’s new single, “Closer,” plays over the title screen, making me a very happy camper.

Which is apparently what Drew told Mama Torres that he and Adam were, as well. They sneak into the house to pack for their “camping trip,” Drew emphasizing to Adam that they have to get out of the house before she gets home. But Adam dallies just a bit too long looking for his iPad (to Skype Becky while he’s away, of course!), and their mother arrives home before they make their escape. She hands them a camp stove for their trip and takes the opportunity to remind Drew of her lack of trust in his recent actions.

On the plane, Adam, Fiona, and Imogen start the flight off by making fun of Drew’s half-assed vows. Bianca’s are great, Imogen explains: “She’s basically like Shakespeare, except she’s female and she’s less dead.”

Meanwhile, Katie, Marisol, and their boyfriends, Jake and Mo, are on the same flight, having been derailed from their beach vacation by a hurricane. Katie and Bianca bump into each other coming out of the plane bathrooms, and Drew trips all over himself trying to defuse the awkwardness, but only succeeds in inviting his ex (Katie) and her friends to crash the wedding. As Imogen intones, “It’s going to be a bumpy ride!”

At the hotel, while Bianca and Drew bicker about the new additions to their wedding party, Adam is thrilled at the ubiquitous-ness of the Vegas showgirls. Time to start the bachelor party, no?

But first, the gayest moment of the episode to complement our previous lesbian moment: Drew and Bianca’s conversation takes place in front of the backdrop of drag queens singing to themselves at the concierge desk. And then Bianca invites the drag queens to join their wedding.

Fiona and Imogen sweep Bianca away to her bachelorette party, leaving Adam and Drew to figure out their bachelor plans. Which turns out to consist of massive amounts of awkwardness, as Jake and Mo hardly know him and the other featured bachelor party at the club puts Drew’s own wedding into stark contrast.

Struck by a sudden realization, Drew slips away to make a call, leaving someone—presumably Bianca—a message about this being a huge mistake.

Over Skype the next day, Adam assures Becky that he only has eyes for her, despite all the showgirls around him in Vegas. Drew pulls Adam away, revealing that it was actually their mother he called last night—he doesn’t think he can get married without her there. He decides he’ll just tell Bianca that they need to postpone to a date Mama Torres can make, that Bianca will understand.

Adam looks at him incredulously. “Have you met Bianca?” he says. He tries to talk Drew back into the wedding, reminding him how much he loves Bianca and how she’s stuck with him through everything.

So as Drew and Adam wait by the altar, Imogen and Fiona escort a petrified Bianca through the lobby. When Imogen returns Bianca’s phone (which had been confiscated before the bachelorette party), and Bianca discovers twenty missed calls from Drew, she freaks out. “Let’s just do this,” Fiona encourages, and they set off toward the chapel again.

But Mama Torres gets there first. “Can we please go home before we go on with this foolishness?” she demands to Drew, right as Bianca walks in.

Drew’s mom quotes the voicemail about this being a huge mistake, prompting Drew to try and clarify that the mistake was his mom’s absence, not the wedding itself, but Bianca shuts him down. “Save it, Drew,” she says. “I get it. I’ll never be enough for you.” She flees, Fiona and Imogen retreating after her.

Mama Torres tries to reason with Drew that he has his whole life ahead of him, but he can’t see past the moment and snaps at her, “Thanks to you, now Bianca might not be in it.” Drew begs his mom not to make him choose between her and his fiancé, but his mom tearfully tells him she just can’t support a teen wedding. So he asks her just to support him.

When Drew finds Bianca in the lobby later, he explains to her that he’s been a fool, but he’s about to make even more of a fool of himself… A statement that was no exaggeration! Drew breaks out into “I Can’t Help Falling in Love with You,” complete with the drag queens ripping off his work-out clothes to reveal a sparkling gold body suit, everyone in the wedding party playing instruments, and even Mama Torres shaking some macarenas. He re-proposes to Bianca, promising that they’ll plan a new wedding, this time in front of everyone they know and love. I change my mind: that was the gayest moment of the episode.

Back home, Mama (and Papa!) Torres throw an engagement dinner for the happy couple, at which Becky sits contentedly next to Adam. Mama Torres welcomes Bianca to the family, and Drew gets down on one knee (how many times has he proposed now?) to give Bianca his great grandmother’s ring, with Audra’s blessing this time.

Meanwhile, in the other half of the episode, Katie is admitted to Stanford, but when she learns that her family doesn’t have the money to afford four years there, she tries her hand (and all her savings) at Black Jack.

After losing all her savings gambling, she calls up the founder of Face Range, who had hit on her at the casino, to see if he can help. He offers to write her a check for the amount of her savings if she spends a day with him, a bargain to which she eventually agrees. He then offers to write her a check for her entire first year at Stanford if she sleeps with him as well.

After a fight with now ex-boyfriend Jake, Katie returns to take the Face Range founder up on his second offer but gets cold feet before it gets too far. On the flight home, she reveals everything to Marisol, along with her decision to take a break from boys until she figures out her future.

And with that eventful week, the Vegas gang is ready to take the rest of the spring semester at Degrassi by storm! …In February, that is. See you all back here then!