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The AfterEllen.com Huddle: The Worst Lesbian and Bisexual Characters

This week Buzzfeed put together a list of the most hated lesbian and bi characters and it just so happened to coincide with Passion opening this week, Rachel McAdams and Noomi Rapace both playing easily unlikable sapphic parts. So we decided to make our own list and ask for your input, as we like to do in our weekly Huddle. I encouraged people to look beyond Jenny Schecter, who seems to be the biggest scapegoat (and Buzzfeed’s #1).

Group, who is the worst lesbian or bisexual character? (Reality TV personalities are allowed.)

Marcie Bianco: Shane. I hate everything Shane stood for. I found her interpersonal ethics, and her haircuts, revolting.

Emily Hartl: Romi Klinger was a sorry excuse for “bisexual” representation. I am so sorry that she’s a representative for you guys! #realtalk

Dana Piccoli: Aside from the fact that she was easy on the eyes, Lana Delany from The Good Wife was the wooorst. Selfish, reckless, and relentlessly ambitious, Kalinda deserved way better. I still get a lump in my throat when I think of Kalinda telling Lana she was going to get her killed. Not cool Lana, not cool.

Kim Hoffman: Tina. Oh, Miss Kennard. Every time she moved her chin, talked about the gooey fluids coming out of her at pregnancy, shouted from her windows to the neighbors in the delusional hope her neighbors wanted to watch her and Helena have sex, chatted with Daddyof2, called Bette “baby” or had a freak-out at anyone around her, I wanted to press mute, or just chug, chug, chug my drink (long live the L Word drinking game).

Chloe: Jessica Stein from Kissing Jessica Stein is hellish. It’s just unacceptable to lead a woman along that much because you have similar taste. The character of Jessica Stein is needy, self-indulgent, and ultimately not very interesting. Just thinking about her irritates me.

Lucy Hallowell: There is no one who comes close to Jenny Schecter when it comes to the wort of the worst. She could have been murdered or hit by a bus or given Dana’s cancer or just sent to a farm upstate and it would have made The L Word a thousand times more enjoyable to watch.

But if I can’t pick Jenny I’m going with Alison DiLaurentis. We can argue about whether she’s actually bisexual or truly just “practicing” with Emily, but other than Jenny I can’t think of hating a character quite so much. She’s a bully who preys on the hopes and dreams of those around her and takes joy in destroying them in the cruelest ways possible. God, I hope Paige runs you under with a car next season.

 

Dara Nai: Speaking of abominations, here’s my pick: Jenny’s assistant from hell, Adele Channing. She was so evil, she made Jenny look like a misguided nitwit. My runners-up are Natasha Lyonne’s and Nia Long‘s characters in If These Walls Could Talk 2. I didn’t like the way they treated ChloĆ« Sevigny. No one should force a butch into a girly shirt and then laugh at her. EVER.

Trish Bendix: I’m sorry but Lindsay Peterson is the most insufferable lesbian character ever. I pretty much disliked the entire storyline the lesbians had on Queer as Folk in general (angry! baby-driven! cheating with a gross guy!) but something about Thea Gill‘s character made her the worst. (Must have been that cheating with the gross guy thing.) It was totally weird how she kissed Brian, too. The writers really gave the guys on the show so much more to work with than they did the token women, but I guess that’s why Showtime gave us The L Word.

Your turn! Who is the worst lesbian or bi character or personality?

Grace Chu: This is such low hanging fruit, but Tila Tequila. Out magazine once called her “the world’s most famous bisexual,” a journalistic crime so unforgivable that the editorial board should be forced to watch the second season of A Shot At Love on repeat in a maximum security prison-for life and without possibility of parole.

Anna Pulley: Tila Tequila. I know she’s technically a real person and not fictitious but c’mon.

Ali Davis: I’m going to choose Catherine Tramell from Basic Instinct. I can’t think of another character who has more firmly solidified the stereotypes in the American mind that bisexual women a) will sleep with anyone, usually for selfish ulterior motives, b) sleep with other women mostly to arouse men, c) always end up with men, and d) are crazy. Plus the movie’s portrayal of female sexuality in general is ugh. Couldn’t the murdering stereotype have stuck instead? Bridget McManus: I don’t “hate” but I am very disappointed with Kitty Butler from Tipping the Velvet. I understand being closeted in the 1890s, but did Kitty have to have an affair with that gross dude in the bed she shared with Nan?

Punky Starshine: I’m in the middle of a post-closet re-watch of The L Word, so that’s probably why my answer is from that show, but Toxic Tonya made me want to punch things (namely her) and I will never ever ever ever ever ever ever understand why Dana put up with her for any period of time or why she didn’t call Lara as soon as she came out. Soup chef forever.

Heather Hogan: I’m going with Samara from Pretty Little Liars, the G/SA counselor who tried to shove 16-year-old Paige McCullers out of the closet when she thought the time was right, and when Paige expressed reservation-on account of she’d only accepted she was gay like three days ago and had a homophobic dad and had been shamed into hating herself for liking girls at the age of 14 by the most horrible human teenager in history and who knows what else going on in that noggin of hers-Samara moved in on her girlfriend. The Lesbian Coming Out Police gross me out anyway, quoting Dr. Seuss about “those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind” like it’s as simple as all that. Does being out help the whole gay community, socially and politically? Absolutely, it does. Does coming out help make you whole? It did for me. But it’s a dynamic process for every single gay person, one zillion factors going into every decision, no two coming outs alike. Samara shook it down to right and wrong and labeled Paige as unfit and then honed in on Emily Fields with her vegan organic Etsy earring shop. But ha ha ha, joke’s on you, Samara: We see who got the girl in the end.

Chloe: Jessica Stein from Kissing Jessica Stein is hellish. It’s just unacceptable to lead a woman along that much because you have similar taste. The character of Jessica Stein is needy, self-indulgent, and ultimately not very interesting. Just thinking about her irritates me.

Lucy Hallowell: There is no one who comes close to Jenny Schecter when it comes to the wort of the worst. She could have been murdered or hit by a bus or given Dana’s cancer or just sent to a farm upstate and it would have made The L Word a thousand times more enjoyable to watch.

But if I can’t pick Jenny I’m going with Alison DiLaurentis. We can argue about whether she’s actually bisexual or truly just “practicing” with Emily, but other than Jenny I can’t think of hating a character quite so much. She’s a bully who preys on the hopes and dreams of those around her and takes joy in destroying them in the cruelest ways possible. God, I hope Paige runs you under with a car next season.

 

Dara Nai: Speaking of abominations, here’s my pick: Jenny’s assistant from hell, Adele Channing. She was so evil, she made Jenny look like a misguided nitwit. My runners-up are Natasha Lyonne’s and Nia Long‘s characters in If These Walls Could Talk 2. I didn’t like the way they treated ChloĆ« Sevigny. No one should force a butch into a girly shirt and then laugh at her. EVER.

Trish Bendix: I’m sorry but Lindsay Peterson is the most insufferable lesbian character ever. I pretty much disliked the entire storyline the lesbians had on Queer as Folk in general (angry! baby-driven! cheating with a gross guy!) but something about Thea Gill‘s character made her the worst. (Must have been that cheating with the gross guy thing.) It was totally weird how she kissed Brian, too. The writers really gave the guys on the show so much more to work with than they did the token women, but I guess that’s why Showtime gave us The L Word.

Your turn! Who is the worst lesbian or bi character or personality?

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