Archive

Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever. (January 11, 2008)

MAYBE SHANE SHOULD APPLY, NOW THAT WAX IS DUST This week Bravo announced that openly lesbian hairstylist Tabatha Coffey, who made it through six episodes of last year’s Shear Genius, will star in her own reality pilot, tentatively titled Tabatha’s Salon Takeover, in which she travels around the United States to make over hair salons. According to the press release:

In the series, the perfectly styled, sharp-tongued Australian native brings her no-nonsense approach to a salon in dire need of a makeover. With just a week to work her magic, can she put these salons back on their feet or is it simply time to put up the closed signs for good?Viewers will get to see Tabatha’s distinct personality as she casts her acerbic eye on the salons she chooses to visit. Viewers will meet the salon owner and his/her stylists and will follow Tabatha as she formulates her plans to takeover these salons, remake them and bring the shops and their staff into the 21st century.
Since the show is still in the pilot stage, Bravo is inviting salon owners to apply to have their shops made over; you can visit BravoTV.com/casting for more info.

You know what this means? A lesbian is now officially a makeover and style guru. Does that mean the stereotype of the frumpy, flannel-wearing diesel dyke has been put to rest? Stay tuned to find out.

ELLEN IS THE PEOPLE’S CHOICE. AGAIN. FOR A CHANGE. On Tuesday night, Ellen DeGeneres took home two People’s Choice Awards, for Favorite Talk Show Host and Favorite Funny Female Star. Ellen has won both of these awards every year since 2005, and even if the People’s Choice Awards aren’t exactly the Oscars, maintaining her popularity for so long – especially while in an increasingly public relationship with girlfriend Portia de Rossi – is kind of incredible. Go American masses!

At this point I would normally show you a picture of Ellen and Portia at the People’s Choice Awards, but because of the Writers Guild strike, there was no red carpet this year. No actors would have crossed the picket lines, so the awards were retooled into a two-hour taped show hosted by Queen Latifah on CBS. That translated into half the number of viewers than last year.

So here’s a pretty picture of Ellen and Portia from the Emmy Awards last September: Ellen’s latest two awards just go to show that getting weepy on television isn’t necessarily a bad thing – it can even help to make you a winner.

AND BY “OPENLY GAY” WE MEAN… At the Season 5 premiere of The L Word last Sunday night in Los Angeles, lesbian rumors hit a new low when Paris Hilton showed up. Yes, that’s Paris in a black wig and gray hat, snuggling with Kate Moennig, Daniela Sea and an unidentified woman (anybody know who that is?). After the premiere party, Paris was seen leaving with Kate, and the two continued partying at lesbian night at Falcon, a lounge on Sunset Blvd.

E! Online’s gossip columnist Marc Malkin even cited an “eye witness” who told him that Kate and Paris were seen “holding hands” there. And we all know “holding hands” automatically equals “lesbian”!

Malkin then went one step further and identified Kate as “the openly gay star of The L Word” in a video report you can watch here. The only problem? Kate has rarely spoken about her sexual orientation, and she has never said that she is a lesbian. In fact, in a 2000 interview with the New York Observer, she was identified as straight and said that she was seeing an actor in Los Angeles “who knows what he wants.”

Does this mean that Malkin outed Kate Moennig? Her representatives did not return our request for comment, but all I can say is, if anyone in Hollywood is planning to come out, please don’t do it by announcing your relationship with Paris Hilton. I think I’d even prefer Lindsay Lohan. There is one last disturbing tidbit to emerge from this unfortunate situation (and you thought it couldn’t get any worse!). According to “a source” quoted on the obviously reliable site GossipGirls.com (I’m being sarcastic), Paris wants to be on The L Word and was actually seen talking to Ilene Chaiken.

Geez, if talking to Ilene means you want a guest spot on The L Word, I’m never going to be able to interview her.

CLEARLY THEY LEARNED NOTHING FROM ROSIE! The women of ABC’s The View disported themselves with embarrassing ignorance earlier this week when they interviewed Cybill Shepherd and Jennifer Beals, who were visiting the gabfest to promote the new season of The L Word.

Sherri Shepherd started things off by demonstrating her excellent background research, saying, “Cybill, you just joined the show.” Since when does having shot two seasons of a show mean you just joined it? Cybill answered with quite a bit of graciousness when she said, “Yes, I just finished my second season.”

But we didn’t have much time for nitpicking, because Elisabeth Hasselbeck immediately asked the most tiresome question ever asked of actresses who play lesbians: “Is it different kissing a man or a woman?”

Cybill once again played polite – and even edgy – when she answered: “It’s just fun, both of them. … I like ’em both, I like kissing both.”

But things just kept getting worse. After Sherri observed to Cybill, “Now you’re into the lifestyle of being a lesbian,” referring to Cybill’s newly out character Phyllis, she asked if that meant that Phyllis and Jennifer Beals’ Bette were going to get together. Because obviously once a lesbian realizes there’s another lesbian anywhere in her vicinity, she hooks up with her immediately. That sexual orientation’s a powerful thing, man.

Last but not least, Joy Behar capped things off by commenting that all the women are so gorgeous on The L Word, but “Aren’t there any ugly lesbians out there?” (Guess that frumpy, flannel-wearing stereotype is still alive and well.)

Jennifer Beals showed remarkable restraint by answering, “Well, not everybody has two hours of hair and makeup.”

Watch the debacle here:

Maybe it’s because I live in a little queer bubble here at AfterEllen.com, but the ignorance that the women of The View showed earlier this week just floored me. Not only did they not do their homework as interviewers, they fell back on stereotypes and questions that just made them look stupid. And it’s clear that spending nine months in the company of an actual lesbian had no real effect on Hasselbeck or even Behar.

No wonder Rosie left.

OLIVIA NEWTON-JOHN GETS PHYSICAL … WITH WOMEN Unless you’re a Southern gay man or an Olivia Newton-John fan (perhaps that’s redundant), you probably haven’t heard of Sordid Lives. The 2000 cult film, based on the 1996 stage play of the same name, is a trashy delight, thanks to great scenery-chewing stars like Leslie Jordan (Will & Grace), Bonnie Bedelia, Delta Burke and, of course, Newton-John.

This fall, Logo (AfterEllen.com’s parent company) brings you a new series based on the play and film and created by writer-director Del Shores. Here’s a snippet from the press release:

The series’ 12 half-hour episodes are a humorous look at a dysfunctional family and the denizens of Winters, Texas, as well as an institutionalized brother (Jordan) who channels Tammy Wynette (Jones). The series also chronicles the handsome young son of one of the sisters (Bedelia) who is struggling with coming out to his Texas Republican Baptist family while pursuing an acting career in Los Angeles.
Many of the cast members from the 2000 film are reprising their roles, including Newton-John, who plays Bisty Mae Harling, a lesbian ex-con and country singer (she will be performing five new songs for the series). Rue McClanahan (Golden Girls) and Caroline Rhea have also signed up (sadly, no Delta Burke). Filming has begun in Louisiana. According to scribegrrrl, if the series is anything like the film, it will be over-the-top and weird – and she means that as a compliment.

DO ASK, DO TELL In a recent article on CNN.com, Rose Rollins and Leisha Hailey spilled some spoilers about their characters’ story lines in Season 5. If you’re avoiding all spoilers, skip ahead to the next page. Moderately spoilerish comments follow the picture below. During this season, Alice will be “used as evidence against Tasha in a two-episode arc featuring Kelly McGillis (Witness, Top Gun) as Col. Gillian Davis, a by-the-book military lawyer.”

“Alice ends up on the stand (at Tasha’s hearing),” Hailey told CNN. “That’s when you see Alice in her full glory. She’s not ashamed to speak out. She’s not afraid to put her foot in her mouth. She’s not afraid to be out of the closet.”

In terms of their personal relationship, Rollins said, “Alice gets me to loosen up. She aids me in realizing what it is I’m fighting for – not the soldier but Tasha as a woman, first. When you don’t think we stand a chance, maybe we do. It is a good relationship.”

If by “good” you mean sexy, cute and fun – wait a minute, Alice and Tasha do have a good relationship. OMG! There’s a relationship on The L Word that I like!

IT’S TIME FOR YOUR WARM UP This past Tuesday, the classic lesbian sports movie Personal Best finally arrived on DVD.

The 1982 drama stars Mariel Hemingway in her dykonic role as Olympic track and field athlete Chris Cahill, who becomes friends (and more!) with fellow athlete Tory Skinner, played by Patrice Donnelly. The film was groundbreaking because it was one of the first gay and lesbian films with a relatively positive picture of same-sex attraction. And it became such a well-known lesbian film that even Ellen DeGeneres referenced it as an inside joke in her coming-out episode of Ellen.

If you haven’t already watched the movie, what are you waiting for? Who doesn’t love a sporty lesbian in really short shorts?

EGYPT’S NOT QUITE READY FOR THE L WORD The View may be annoying ill-informed, but at least its hostesses don’t think lesbianism is immoral and sinful – something that cannot be said for several Islamic scholars in Egypt, reacting this week to the fiilm Heena Maysara (Until Further Notice), which includes a lesbian relationship.

Al Arabiya reported (thanks, GetReal, for the tip) that Cairo University professor Dr. Abdel-Sabour Shahin (who was supported by other Islamic scholars at Al-Azhar University) “claimed the movie is part of ‘a Zionist and American conspiracy’ which uses this sort of movie to destroy the moral fabric of society.”

In the movie, actress Ghada Abdel-Razeq‘s character, a lesbian, tries to seduce Sumaya Al-Khashab’s character. In addition to including this lesbian seduction scene, the film “is set in a Cairo shanty town and tackles the issues of poverty, crime and physical and sexual abuse.” (Seems to me that lesbianism is the least of the “problems” presented in the movie!) Even worse? A professor of Islamic law, Elwi Amin, claimed that there is no lesbianism at all in Egypt. “Many people in Egypt do not even know what the word ‘lesbianism’ means,” he said. “This is the influence of immoral Western culture which controls the media.”

Uh, right. That old “gay agenda” specter again?

Actress Sumaya Al-Khashab did respond courageously by saying, “Whoever watches the movie will realize that this scene was important to the story line and is not included just to be sensational.” The director, Khaled Yousef, asked people to watch the movie before they passed judgement.

The positive angle to this story is that now, at least, there is one movie available in Egypt that includes lesbian characters. Only 23.6 more tragic lesbian films to go (according to top-secret AfterEllen.com calculations) before Egyptian lesbians get a happy ending!

NOT ANOTHER D MOVIE! Openly bisexual actor Kristanna Loken has a small role in the Uwe Boll film In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, which opens today. (Yes, Boll is the guy who directed the awful BloodRayne, which nonetheless gave us a great Michelle Rodriguez/Kristanna Loken sword fight.) Here’s the premise of the film, as described at the film’s official site:

The life of a hardworking man known only as Farmer (Jason Statham) is changed forever when a marauding band of Krug – animalistic brutes in the thrall of an evil sorcerer – thunders down upon the unsuspecting village of Stonebridge, killing his son and kidnapping his wife, Solana (Claire Forlani). Galvanized by his grief, the one peace-loving peasant leads his mentor Norick (Ron Perlman) and brother-in-law Bastian (Will Sanderson) in pursuit of the Krug army to free Solana.
Kristanna plays someone named Elora. I have no idea who Elora is, but judging from the trailer and some of the stills from the movie, she’s often wearing leather and being acrobatic. What I’ve always found interesting is that Uwe Boll manages to get the oddest people into his movies. In the Name of the King also stars Burt Reynolds as King Konreid and Leelee Sobieski (remember her as Joan of Arc?) as Muriella, who seems to be some kind of princess/fighting lady (see photo above). OK, that doesn’t convince me to see the film either.

But if you’re in Los Angeles this weekend, you can see Kristanna Loken in person. She’ll be making an appearance at the Los Angeles Comic Book and Science Fiction Convention on Jan. 13.

LESBIAN QUOTE OF THE WEEK NO. 1 “The set was a blast. Like Gay Camp ’07.” – Clementine Ford to AfterEllen.com, at the Season 5 premiere of The L Word

CAN YOU HAVE A HEALTHY OBSESSION WITH A BLOOD BANK TECHNICIAN? This week the Queer Lounge, Sundance’s LGBT-centered mixing-and-mingling hub, announced a list of more than 40 queerish films that will be screening at Sundance, Slamdance and elsewhere in Park City, Utah, beginning Jan. 17. We’ve already told you about Pariah and The Guitar (starring Saffron Burrows), but now there are a couple more films we’ll be keeping our eyes on.

The documentary feature An American Soldier follows Sergeant First Class Clay Usie, one of the most succesful army recruiters in the United States, over several months; one of the soldiers he recruits is a lesbian.

And Sunshine Cleaning tells the story of a professional crime-scene cleaner “who develops an unhealthy obsession with a blood bank technician” according to the Queer Lounge press release. Emily Blunt (The Devil Wears Prada, My Summer of Love) stars as the crime-scene cleaner, Mary Lynn Rajskub (24, Punch-Drunk Love) plays the object of her obsession, and Amy Adams plays Blunt’s sister. From that brief summary, Sunshine Cleaning sounds like a CSI episode gone horribly wrong. Except without any Sara Sidle. Oops, that’s like all of CSI these days.

LESBIAN QUOTE OF THE WEEK NO. 2 “But it’s not anybody’s business who I sleep with or who I f—! I don’t give a s–t what the magazine is. People are going to come up with whatever they want to come up with on their own; I don’t have to make announcements. Come on!” – Shelby Lynne, responding to repeated questions about her sexuality from reporter Michele Kort, in the issue of The Advocate hitting newsstands on January 15th

.

BEHIND THE LENS WITH JENNIFER BEALS The new issue of The Advocate also includes a slew of photos of L Word cast members taken by Jennifer Beals. Here’s a sneak peek at the first page of the fascinating spread of black-and-white pics: Beal took the top photo of Leisha Hailey at a Vanity Fair photo shoot. But I really like the bottom photo, which is a shot of Mia Kirshner, Kate Moennig, Leisha Hailey and Sarah Shahi (R.I.P., Carmen!) from an earlier season. Beals explains in the caption: “Leisha’s holding this book where you think of a question and then you open the book to see what the answer is. We were slightly obsessed with it during downtime.”

What do you think the book would say if the question were, “Why is Mia Kirshner being tortured by having to play the most annoying character ever?”

LESBIAN BUYS WNBA TEAM (NO, REALLY!) Earlier this week, a group of four Seattle businesswomen and civic leaders secured an exclusive option to purchase WNBA basketball team the Seattle Storm for $10 million from SuperSonics owner Blay Bennett, ensuring that the Storm will remain in Seattle. Among the four women, who now comprise Force 10 Hoops, L.L.C., is Lisa Brummel, Microsoft’s openly lesbian senior vice president for human resources. The other three women of Force 10 Hoops are software industry exec Dawn Trudeau, entrepreneur and philanthropist Ginny Gilder and former Deputy Mayor of Seattle Anne Levinson. Lisa Brummel was previously corporate vice president of Microsoft’s Home & Retail Division, was drafted by the Dallas Diamonds in the professional women’s basketball league draft in 1981, and played softball and basketball at Yale University.

A few summers ago, Sarah and Lori had season tickets to the Storm games (when they were living in Seattle) that happened to seat them next to Lisa and her partner, Celeste. They weren’t surprised to hear Lisa has become one of the team’s new owners.

“Lisa and Celeste were always big fans of the team,” Sarah told me, “and a lot of fun to watch the games with. They knew all the players’ stats better then we did, and filled us in on what happened whenever we missed a game. In exchange, I kept them updated on the latest AfterEllen.com stats, which weren’t nearly as interesting, but they pretended they were. The team is definitely in good hands!” I think they should make a one-hour dramedy about these four high-powered, successful businesswomen. They could call it Microfiber Mafia.

WILLOW, KENNEDY AND … TINA FEY? The latest issue of the Buffy Season 8 comic series (No. 10: “Anywhere But Here”) is chock full of lesbian-y goodness!

First, when Buffy and Willow are swapping fantasy celebrity hookup stories, we find out that Willow’s involves a storm, a ski chalet, and Tina Fey: You know you’ve reached the heights of honorary lesbian status when even fictional lesbians have a crush on you!

Then Kennedy the Lesbian Vampire Slayer makes her first appearance in the comic, and we find out why she’s been MIA this season … It turns out that Willow has been keeping Kennedy at arm’s length from her friends, not because she doesn’t care about her, but because she doesn’t want to be put in the position of having to choose between Buffy and the woman she loves – again.

We also discover that Willow slept with a beautiful demon during a moment of weakness in her past, but you’ll just have to read the comic to see that one. And no, the beautiful demon was not Anya. Unfortunately.

TAKE THAT INDIGESTION AND … WRITE A SONG ABOUT IT? Out guitarist Kaki King’s upcoming fourth album, Dreaming of Revenge, is due to be released on March 4, but you can already get a taste of it by listening to her new song “2 O’Clock” at Stereogum. In the accompanying Q&A, King is asked about the story behind the lyrics and explains:

The song is written about me, from the perspective of my ex-girlfriend. I went through a long difficult phase when I would stay up really late, eventually sleep and have vivid and terrifying dreams, and when I finally woke up in the afternoon I would be sick from all the acid that had built up in my stomach. It was an awful time. She would cook me breakfast most mornings and half the time I wouldn’t be able to eat a bite. It was a terrible time for me and must have been just as bad for her. Writing these lyrics was a way of acknowledging how f—ed up our situation was and for me to take the blame for it.
Wow. I’ve had some nights like that, but they typically involve staying up till all hours writing Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever.

CH-CH-CH-CHANGES You may have noticed that AfterEllen.com’s home page looks a bit different this week. The changes have been made in order to make it easier for you to zero in on the type of content you’re most interested in – whether it’s articles and interviews, blog posts, or video blogs. Specifically, we wanted to separate the written blog posts from the video blogs, so those of you who aren’t into the vlogs can ignore them (or if you really love them, you can find them right away).

We’ve also improved the layout of our video blogs page and added a video blog schedule there so you can keep track of when new episodes of your favorite vlogs will be posted.

We’re still working on improving the overall design of the site, but you’ll always be able to find the featured articles at the top of the home page. Below them, you’ll find written blog posts on the left side, and our latest vlogs and other video offerings on the right. Older articles continue to be featured in the lower half of the home page.

For more details on the new homepage layout, read Sarah’s post about it in the forum. If you have specific suggestions, please post them there so that we can find them easily in the future.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! Margaret Cho will appear on The Ellen DeGeneres Show on Jan. 23 to announce the tour dates for her new stand-up show, Beautiful, which is her first in three years.

The Pan African Film & Art Festival just announced their selection of LGBT films for their 2008 festival, which will occur in Los Angeles Feb. 7-18. Among the films you can see there are the drama The World Unseen (look for a review of it here later this month), The Incredibly True Adventures of Team S.I.S.: Sistas of the Canyon (a documentary from out writer Jasmyne Cannick), Pariah and Truth Hall. Stay tuned for more details.

Logo and Curve have teamed up to present “The Ladies of Logo,” a downloadable iTunes collection of videos, including the first episodes of Curl Girls, Exes & Ohs, Rick and Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World and The Big Gay Sketch Show, and the documentary Real Momentum: Out on the Job. Go here to get more info.

David Mamet’s new play, November, which is set just before a presidential election and stars Nathan Lane U.S. President Charles Smith and Laurie Metcalf as lesbian speech writer Clarice Bernstein, opens on Broadway Jan. 17. Go here for more info, and look for a review of it here later this month.

FX’s tabloid drama Dirt is scheduled to return March 7. Though the series had initially been given a 13-episode order, only seven had been written before the WGA strike, so only seven will air this season. There is no confirmation yet on whether or not Carly Pope will reprise her role as lesbian drug dealer Garbo, or if Jennifer Aniston will return to kiss Courteney Cox again.

Here! TV has greenlit a second season of Lesbian Sex and Sexuality, the documentary series from filmmaker Katherine Linton, tentatively scheduled to air this summer. Season 2 will explore lesbian sex workers, fashion, camp and the mother of all lesbian pool parties – The Dinah.

Last week, we told you that The Lo-Down would return on Jan. 15, but due to last-minute schedule changes, it will now be returning one day earlier, Jan. 14. Sarah Pecora and I have some crazy shenanigans in store for you, so come back on Monday and let us know what you think of our new direction.

Today’s episode of She Made Me Watch This! is devoted to reviewing the first two episodes of Cashmere Mafia, complete with clips of the lesbian storyline in the first two episodes, an analysis of the original pilot versus the one you saw, and tips from Lori on climbing the corporate ladder. Watch it here now!</>

Next Thursday: the first episode of Cathy DeBuono’s new vlog What’s Your Problem? Err, how much time do you have, Cathy?

That’s it for this week! Check back next Friday for another edition of Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever.

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button