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“The Walking Dead” recap (5.13): Forget

It’s almost like watching the Twilight Zone with each new episode of The Walking Dead. Now that Rick and the gang are setting up shop in Alexandria, there’s a new test to memorize in order to survive: Maintain your sharpness while keeping up appearances, but don’t go soft. Sasha takes a stranger’s family photos out into the woods for target practice. As her eyes dart around after each shot, she anxiously awaits the sound of walkers. Out in the woods-that’s where our group gets their kicks nowadays, while back inside women like Olivia who we just met are jonesing to cure some meat and hope Sasha will return with pickles. Outside this community, our group became accustomed to not only killing walkers at every new turn, but to being on guard for anything to happen at literally any moment. Now, there’s talk of a welcoming party at Deanna’s. Has anyone seen Tara? And yes, Carol is still sporting a killer cardigan set.

In last week’s episode, it seemed almost too wild-the idea that Carol has somehow reverted back to being “the good wife” with that proud smile across her face. Something tells me Carol has way more tricks up her sleeve now that she’s been plopped into this role again than we realize. In the woods, Carol, Rick and Daryl have a private meeting at the abandoned house where Rick ditched his gun in a blender and it disappeared. They decide they’ll raid the gun pantry where they stow away loads of weaponry that Carol says they’ll hardly notice is missing. Suddenly, a pack of walkers approaches and they notice one of them has a carving on his head, it reads: W. Now what could that stand for? Winner? Walt? Wimp? Walker? Back in the neighborhood, Michonne is cooling at a perfect 74 degrees as she tries on her newly appointed cop uniform. Of course, in true Michonne fashion, she’s added her own flair to the windbreaker-a braid of material up the back. She and Rick briefly discuss how surreal this new undertaking is-baffled that a town would hire a pair of strangers to be their authority.

Deanna tells the group that she sees this place turning into a civilized, governmental, sustainable community, with industries and commerce. Rick calls them “lucky”-maybe the luckiest people there ever were in this new world. It’s true. It’s like this is the Pleasantville of the zombie apocalypse. All of this after Rick and co. just nearly lost their lives in that barn, during that terrible storm when he proposed heroically that they are (pause) the walking dead. While Carol chats lady talk on the porch with a few other townspeople-you know, just swap talk about cooking methods for the big party, Carol rejoins Rick and offers to him she’s just getting into the swing of things-it’s particularly easy for her to blend in (I just knew that blender held some irony!), which means they’ll surely be able to sneak away at the party without going unnoticed to fetch some of those hidden guns. Hey, that’s what happens when you put on your best smile, and the color salmon.

Daryl runs into Aaron out in the woods. We didn’t see much of Aaron or his boyfriend Eric in the last episode-they were probably recovering and getting Eric back on his feet. Or cuddling in bed. Aaron is surprised when Daryl pulls him out of his hiding area. He asks if Daryl can hear the difference between a walker and a human. Daryl just continues chewing on his cheek, per usual, and tells Aaron to keep up. They spot a horse-Aaron says its name is Buttons. These people and their naming. Right as Daryl is about to lasso this horse back with them to Alexandria, a hoard of walkers spook the horse away. Meanwhile, Carol is talking with Olivia-who apparently works record keeping in the pantry and the gun locker. She just can’t believe Carol’s little secret-substituting applesauce for eggs in cookie batter? Oh, what a hootenanny. Carol’s like, “Yeah, I got a whole recipe book full of secrets.” Just as she’s fishing a chocolate bar out of the “hall freezer” a couple of guys enter to the gun locker to fetch some weapons. One guy introduces himself as Tobin. He asks if Carol is afraid of guns. Rick is right. We’re in a play. And that play is called “Carol Has Y’all Fooled.” She bats her eyes and tells Tobin she had a handgun out there, but the big ones-yeah, those are mighty scary! He offers his assistance in teaching her the proper ways to use a gun. What no one standing nearby can see is that Carol’s simply unlocked the window that leads into the gun locker, and also, that she was once an Ewok-looking woodland creature who bombed a warehouse of cannibals and killed a child.

As Deanna’s party begins, Rick, Carl, Baby Judith, Abraham and Rosita walk in. Rick meets Deanna’s husband who has nothing but nice things to say about Rick’s heroism. Sasha really wants to get involved-someone needs to be in that watchtower every day and she’s willing. Why has Deanna been so resistant with her? She told Sasha to come to her party, what will happen when Sasha arrives? Will she arrive? While partygoers sip their booze (the only reason Abraham is sticking around), Daryl and Aaron are still on the hunt for Buttons. Unfortunately, it’s too late. Buttons is taken down by a pack of walkers and Aaron must put him out of his misery.

Attempting to make a connection with Daryl, Aaron tells him that he’s felt like an outcast, too-with Eric. People in the community have apparently said shitty, homophobic things to them. Surely not from Deanna’s angelic son, I hope. Daryl just keeps quiet-but there have been rumblings of Daryl’s sexuality in the media as of late. Variety recently posted an article about Normal Reedus “playing Daryl gay”-he was just on Conan where he said he would, “If that’s the story they gave me, I would rock that story. I’m not afraid of it.” Of course, this brings up our girl Tara-she had one line in last week’s episode, will her character receive more recognition, ever? TWD has received backlash since February when we were first introduced to Aaron and Eric. Buzzfeed reported plenty of tweets objecting to their onscreen kiss we witnessed when the pair was reunited after almost being mauled by zombies. But, hey-apparently in this post-world, your sexuality is supposed to be as obsolete as running water and electricity. Moral of the story: Maybe Alexandria needs its first official LGBT center. Tara for Prez.

Aaron invites Daryl in for some spaghetti with him and Eric. The couple smiles on as Daryl chows down on some hot, delicious pasta. Aaron takes Daryl out into the garage to uncover his big secret-there’s a motorcycle with Daryl’s name on it. Aaron’s been collecting parts, but Daryl is the man for the job. The reason? Well, it’s way more than just Aaron fearing for his lover’s life as a second recruiter out there alongside him, it’s about knowing now that Daryl is literally the best out there in the world-and yes, he can tell the difference between a good person and a bad person. By the glint in Daryl’s eye, I can almost see that he agrees. Maybe flashes of his time with Beth creep back in as Aaron relays how hard he knows this acclimating to people must be-it will force Daryl to truly meet himself. Back at Deanna’s, everyone’s doing a little bit of meeting and greeting as well. Rick meets Jessie’s husband, again. This time, he seems nicer. At least to Rick, he snaps at Jessie when she offers the man a drink. Speaking of drinks, everyone’s getting completely sloshed, which really shouldn’t take much since the only buzz anyone’s had in years is from the onset of a Georgia heat stroke.

Outside, Michonne stares at a cocktail sword-quite different from the one she’s used to having slung on her back. Abraham can’t put four words together without sounding like a ginger apple bobbing up and down in a glass of water. At least he’s being a happy drunk. After giving a speech about feeling your weapon on you, even when it’s not, he talks about being way thankful-asking Michonne what she’s done. She says, “I put on this dress.” But he’s asking for something else. What’s this all about? What does he mean? Is he being sexy toward Michonne?

Carol is on a mission-oh, thank god. I missed Carol on missions. This time, it’s to get those guns out of the locker without being seen. Oh, too late. It’s Jessie’s little boy. The kids in this community are mostly boys, teen boys, and asshole adult boys-Rick meets Jessie’s boy, who stamps him with an ‘A’ on his hand, which probably makes Rick think one of two things: Is Aria’s brother A? Or Who put a stamp on that walker’s forehead? Carol tells the boy she’ll make him a whole batch of cookies! He can’t tell his mom he’s found her in here. But, but-he tells his mom everything! Carol walks toward the boy, cornering him as she does. There are several things that our Carol is quite amazing at: acting demure to half-witted men, playing invisible, and scaring the living day lights out of children. Lock your gun lockers, hide your kids-Carol’s is a cardigan with a casserole and cookies and she’s not messing around. After telling the boy about where he’ll end up if he tells (far, far away, tied to a tree, helpless and scared) she backs away again, and by now, I imagine the boy has peed his pants twice over.

Back at the party, Rick shares a sexy little moment with Jessie-which is hardly shocking. We all knew from the beginning that she was eyeing him and vice versa. Who knows where her husband went, but as she dotes on Baby Judith, handing him over to Rick, he kisses her on the check. By the look of it, she’s hardly offended. Someone who totally is offended right now though: Sasha. Just when we thought Daryl would be the first to crack under pressure, Sasha enters the party and slowly take in all of the conversation around her-mixing visions of the party with visions of walkers ripping at flesh, the people she’s lost, and then back to the carefree present, everyone’s guard down, unaware of the dangers that lurk. Someone’s worried they won’t make her the meal she likes best.

The next day, while half of Alexandria is probably way hung over and whipping up a brunch together like it’s no big deal because this is motherfucking Alexandria and you can have whatever you like, the three musketeers, Carol, Daryl and Rick meet in the woods for a handing-out of the guns. Daryl says he’s good. He’s “trying.” Rick takes one. Sasha and Deanna have it out when Sasha tells her this isn’t real, and Deanna calls bullshit because Deanna is a sharp-tongued bad ass. After Rick comes back inside the gates, a happy sunshine song starts playing as he takes his walk down Main Street. Oh wait, what’s that sign say? Morgan Street? I can’t help but figure that’s a bit of classic foreshadowing. Morgan Jones is still a man at large, hunting down Rick, right? Rick sees Jessie and her family walking by, they share a little moment (again) holding up their stamped ‘A’s and then Rick plays cop in the yard, acting way comfortable with this newfound epiphany- that he’s protected and is protecting-and packing. Even Michonne has put up her sword, literally-on the wall above the mantel to her fireplace. In her living room. In her house. Is this real life?

What do you think will happen next? A spring maypole? Another round of Carol’s cookies? More trouble from Deanna’s son? A steamy secret romance brewing between Rick and Jessie? And where on Earth is Tara? Seriously. Has anyone seen her?

Tweet me @the_hoff and check back next Sunday!

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