Previously on The Returned, we found out that Peter, the guy who just loves to help people, helped kill Victor and his mom nearly thirty years ago. Lena’s zombie wound is getting worse, and it’s the exact same injury that was on Camille’s dead body. Another Returned guy came back and pulled a shotgun on his brother Tony, who is the bartender at the Dog Star.
Seven years ago
Tony’s mom wakes up and realizes her other son “got out,” which is, immediately, a red flag. Anytime you have to keep a family member locked up – I mean, it’s just probably not a good situation. Tony goes out to bring his brother home, and sees him walking into the good old town murder tunnel.
Adam, Tony’s brother, stabs Julie a few times and then starts biting the wounds on her stomach (EWWWW WHY). Tony shows up and clocks him in the head. Good job, Tony. But, instead of helping Julie in any way, he just takes his stupid, murder-y brother home. Bad job, Tony. At home, Adam wakes up as Tony is burying him alive (awkward) and insists that he will for sure never murder anyone again. Tony stabs him with his shovel and continues to sniffle/cry/dig.
Present day
Adam and Tony are eating dinner, and Adam is being pretty nonchalant about being back from the dead. He wants to go into to town for groceries, but Tony is like, “Uh, bro, you are basically a zombie, so if anyone sees you it will be bad.” Adam’s like, “Whatevs, how did I die anyway? You said I was sick.” Tony is not sure how to describe the type of sick where you stab women and eat their stomachs, but he knows it’s bad. Over at the hospital, Julie visits Lucy (Adam’s most recent victim). She looks at her wounds, so similar to her own, and holds her hand.
Tommy and Rowan are still in the same house, which I don’t get at all. If I were Rowan, I’d be literally anywhere else. She is drinking wine and crying, and Tommy tries to explain that he did all the lying and spying to protect her, because he’s the nicest guy in the whole wide world. Since he’s just so nice, he’s willing to forgive her dalliance with Simon, because he’s seen the movie Ghost and he knows how tempting a pottery wheel can be. But Tommy also believes that Simon is dangerous, and wants Rowan to think about that.
Meanwhile at the community center, Victor confronts Peter-and he actually talks! Victor tells Peter that he knows Peter killed his mother and then killed him. Peter is alarmed, but before he can respond, the power goes out and Victor is gone by the time he finds a flashlight.
The next day, Rowan is taking her daughter’s class on a walking tour of the town. As an ex-waitress/librarian, I’m not sure why she’s qualified to provide a verbal history, but let’s just go with it. She decides it might be fun to traumatize a group of children, so she tells them about how the dam broke 29 years ago and killed a bunch of people. She also thinks she sees Simon, but it’s just another broody musician. Honestly, those guys are a dime a dozen.
Back at the community center, Peter has had no luck finding Victor. He asks Helen if Victor said anything before he left, and, after answering that he did not, Helen asks Peter the very same question. When Peter says no, Helen gives him a knowing smile and leaves to go for a walk. She heads down to the river and wades into the water, enjoying just a moment of peace before a deranged procession of deer carcasses floats past.
In arguably the best scene on The Returned so far, Nikki is making out in bed with a woman (not Julie, though). Before things can escalate, she receives a call from the other police officer in town (the one who isn’t Tommy). She bristles at being bothered on her day off, and not-Tommy is like, “Oh, you lesbianing right now? Cool.” He tells her about a missing persons report from four years ago that sounds similar to Victor. She hangs up and tells not-Julie that she, unfortunately, can’t scissor at the moment. Not-Julie is sad.
Nikki goes to the community center to question Victor. Peter gets squirrely, all, “Funny story, ha ha, he’s actually not here.” Nikki’s like, “Yeah, that’s not funny. Why didn’t you call?” Peter tries to play it off like it’s no big deal, and Nikki tells him to call if the kid hasn’t come back by the evening.
Tommy is down at the river, and all the buck carcasses have been pulled from the water. They need to run some tests to make sure the drinking water is still safe. Perhaps more importantly, they need to figure out why the fuck a bunch of deer died for no apparent reason.
Back at the center, Peter informs Simon that the cops (aka just one cop who was not looking for Simon at all) came by earlier, and he doesn’t think it’s safe for Simon to stay. Peter brings Simon over to Camille’s house all, “You’re both zombies back from the dead, discuss.” Peter apologizes to Claire for the inconvenience and she’s like, “Oh Peter, you’re such a great guy, don’t apologize!” You can actually see the guilt crystallize on Peter’s face, because he is very aware that he is emphatically not a great guy.
Over at the deliverance ranch, Tony arrives home to find Adam covered in blood. He doesn’t realize that it’s just deer blood and not human lady blood at first, so he freaks out. He ends up admitting that ok yes, he did kill Adam, but he’s really sorry about it. Adam’s like, “Apology not accepted, bro.” He puts a knife to his brother’s throat, and Tony wants him to go ahead and kill him or forgive him OR SOMETHING. I just wish Tony had maybe called the police instead of murdering his brother seven years ago, but what do I know.
During their zombie-bonding-sesh, Camille asks Simon if he remembers dying. Simon tells her that no, he doesn’t actually remember getting hit by a car, but he remembers parts of the day it happened. It was his wedding day, and he was so happy, but also really scared. He asks Camille if she’ll do him a favor, and Camille actually says, “Sure. Us dead people have to stick together.” It confuses my insides, because on one hand I love friendship and it’s kind of heart-warming, but on the other hand they are supposed to be dead and that is terrifying.
Camille goes to Rowan’s house to deliver Simon’s message, which is to meet him at the train station at 6pm and bring Chloe. Rowan’s like, uh, who are you and how do you know Simon? Camille tells her that Simon is staying at her house until he can leave with Rowan, and that she’s helping him out. Rowan asks if she’s “like Simon.” Camille goes, “Yes, and listen girl, I may look young, but coming back to life has made me wise as fuck. I’m going to drop some knowledge on you: You can’t stop love.”
Tommy is meeting with the town medical examiner, and he explains that the cause of death for all the deer was drowning. Tommy is like, “Listen here mister, I’ve been hunting deer even longer than I’ve been spying on women, and I know that deer can swim!” The M.E. also knows that, so, obviously, the only solution is that the deer all committed suicide. Okay.
Helen runs into Victor downtown. She calls him Henry, and asks if he remembers her. Shockingly, he does not respond. She takes him to get some food, and tells him that she knew his mother, and what happened to the two of them was just awful. She thinks everything happens for a reason, why else would they meet again as semi-zombies 29 years later? She also thinks the town is cursed, and I have to agree. A lot of fucked up stuff happens there. Helen also makes another biblical reference, this time comparing their town’s flood to the Genesis Flood (the one with Noah and his ark, for all you heathens out there).
Rowan finds some old pics of Simon along with a sweet mix cd up in her attic. She plays the cd, as we cut to Simon waiting alone at the train station. Rowan throws away the box full of Simon-memories abruptly.
Tommy gets home and Rowan asks him which flowers he likes for their wedding. I’m sorry, what?! Girl. I totally get not running off with your dead, potentially emotionally unstable ex-lover. In fact, I 100% support it. But don’t stay with the douchebag who lied to you and has been secretly watching you for who knows how long!! Don’t marry him, are you kidding me?
Meanwhile, Camille-as-Alice is off getting wasted with Lena’s friends. She shows off a bracelet, and tells them that her musician ex-boyfriend gave it to her. Teenagers are the worst, huh? They take some shots and Camille is just straight up loving life. Her sister Lena, however, is still in the hospital. Jack watches her sleep for a few minutes, before stepping outside to add vodka to his orange juice.
Like father, like daughter, I guess, because back at the Dog Star, Camille takes four shots in a row without batting an eyelash. Excuse me while I throw up. The boy (Hunter, I think? Or maybe Ben?) can’t even do one shot-psh, what a loser. The winner gets to make the loser do whatever they want, so Camille marches right up to Benter and starts making out with his face. In the hospital, Lena seems to be able to feel some of the sensations. (Side bar: There is an amazing podcast called Invisibilia, and they have a great episode that features a woman with Mirror-touch synesthesia. Go listen to it.) Lena has had enough of this bullshit, frankly, so she rips out her IV and gets out of bed.
Peter is driving around, looking for Victor, and finally finds him walking along the side of the road. He gets out of his car and says, “Hello, Henry.” It’s pretty creepy.
Tony is taking the trash out at the Dog Star when he sees Adam, who bumps into Lena as she angrily storms up to the bar. Lena slaps Camille and confronts her in front of her/their friends. Now I’ve got a bit a soft spot for Lena-her parents obviously love her sister more and, also, she is like the only person in town to correctly react to people coming back from the dead-but this was not a smart move. She looks like a crazy person in her hospital gown, babbling nonsense about her dead sister and showing the disgusting wound on her back.
Lena runs off into the woods, and Camille follows. Camille tries to catch up with her sister, but Lena doesn’t stop until she stumbles and finally collapses from exhaustion. A shadow falls over her body, and there’s serial killer Adam, hovering over her. Ruh roh, will Adam wash down Lena’s stomach with a nice chianti? Tune in to The Returned next week to find out.
