“Call the Midwife” recap (4.8): Another Lesbian Tragedy

It’s the season finale of Call the Midwife, and like most finales it has laughter, tears, and neo-natal poisoning. We open with the women of Nonnatus House hosting an engagement party for Fred and Violet. Trixie is upset when she sees that Wini has placed the cake on the same board from her engagement party, while I wonder what the actual fuck a cake board is. We also see the welcome return of Chummy, who is spending a couple of weeks in London for a training seminar.

mid1-001 Is that my fucking cake board?

Chummy walks in with a tin of cookies, so you know Sister Monica Joan is going to be all over it. Unfortunately, the tin holds the remains of Chummy’s dead mother, and not a cookie in sight. She also brings in a toilet training seat that she forgot to leave with her husband and son. Worst. Engagement. Gifts. Ever.

Later at the clinic, we meet Maureen, a pregnant mum with vicious morning sickness. We know this because moments after meeting her, we see her puking in her purse. We’ve all been there, girl. The other mothers keep an eye on him, and the women joke about how science will soon have a birth control pill. LOL future.

mid2-001 Don’t mind her, she just saw last night’s Game of Thrones

We also meet Marlene, Fred’s bitchy daughter, who is none too pleased about his recent engagement. Fun fact, all the mean women in Poplar have beehives. Marlene is upset that Fred plans on leaving their childhood home to live with Violet. This girl is bad news.

Trixie is making a protein face mask out of egg whites, and invites Chummy to join her. She laments aging, while Chummy would rather have the treatment in the form of a custard. Chummy wants to scatter her mother’s ashes, but she has no idea where to do so.

mid3-001 Mrs. Doubtfire role play

Trixie tends to a deaf expectant mum June. They try to communicate with hand gestures and a shared notebook, but luckily her loving husband Kevin arrives to help translate. He tells Trixie that as soon as he met June, he started learning sign language. Since there is no one else to translate, he will be in the room during her delivery. Later, the women of Nonnatus House discuss a husband in the delivery room. Evangelina thinks it’s improper and unnecessary, while Crane tells them about an “artistic couple” whose husband fainted.

Meanwhile, Patsy and Delia are on a date at the local coffee shop. Delia tells Patsy she’s renting an apartment, and she wants them to live together. Patsy is hesitant, but when Delia assures her that women can roommates and no one will care, not even the nuns. That, and the promise of closed doors and privacy sway Patsy. Somebody call the U-Haul.

mid4-001 I love you, but going down on you in the chapel is murder on my knees

Marlene comes by Violet’s shop to crap all over the engagement. First, she lays on the whole “You’re not my mom” line, and then makes it seem like her own father is a gold digger with no retirement plan. That’s hitting below the belt, Marlene.

mid5-001 Putting the B in beehive

Trixie is giving labor classes when June and her husband show up to join. At first, the other mums are upset that their husbands can’t join, but Kevin soon charms them and they allow him to join in. Fred brings Violet some messed up discount meringues, which doesn’t make her feel any more secure about his money situation.