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“Carmilla” recap (2.9 & 2.10): Twisted Sister

Greetings from sunny Canada…err, I mean Styria! I’m on vacation in Toronto so what could be more fitting than recapping Carmilla?

After nearly rupturing everyone’s eardrums last week with her ferocious scream, Mattie lays down the cold, hard facts. This is not a democracy, it’s a vampocracy. Silas is broke and she will sell and cancel whatever she damn well pleases to pay for the expenses. End of discussion. Then she’s all, “Toodles, sis!” and takes off.

Laura and the others try to get it together whilst bleeding from the ears. Laura asks Carmilla if she can do the T-Rex screaming thing, but Carm tells her that Mattie is older and being a member of the board has its supernatural privileges. Let this be a lesson, kids: When researching colleges, choose one without a board that can literally make your head explode. Laura still thinks this all links back to the newspaper investigation, but everyone is fresh out of good ideas on how to handle it. Danny is firmly on Team Stake, while Carmilla will cut a bitch if they try to kill her sister.

Laura brings us a new segment called “Moment of Cute,” which involves Kirsch offering to help the Summer Society throw a secret Adonis Hunt because he thinks that will make Danny happy.

Laura’s warm fuzzy moment doesn’t last long because LaFontaine and Perry rush in because J.P. is in serious trouble. His signal is nearly fried from losing the connection to the library and is slipping away more and more. He’s not even really making sense anymore, talking about death and cake and saints. It’s actually really sad. No one knows how to save J.P. without Mattie’s help.

Perry pulls out some of the files the newspaper staff was researching about Mattie and the board trying to sell off parts of Silas…including the one that houses the anglerfish god. Laura is convinced that Mattie and the board have something to do with the newspaper murders, because there’s no way Mattie could have recognized Perry otherwise. Hmm, I’m not so sure about that. I think Perry has a special role to play in all of this, but I’m just not sure what it is yet. Anyway, Laura wonders aloud how they could possibly get Mattie to tell them the truth about what’s really happening, and that’s when Perry suggests that perhaps Carmilla could take one for the team.

In the following episode, Laura tells us that Carmilla’s spy job on Mattie worked pretty well at first. The sisters have a heart to heart about their past. (Apparently Carmilla was quite a handful back in the day-oh, and mother’s favorite.) They reminisce about matricide attempts (ha! Mothers! Can’t live with em, can’t live without thrusting a magical sword into their sternums.) Carmilla asks Mattie to cut the shit and explain why she’s really there. Mattie says that she’s just following their mother’s wishes and those pesky students won’t really be an issue soon anyway. Whaaaaa?

Carmilla tries to lead Mattie into confessing about the newspaper murders, but little sis has it all wrong. Mattie knows that Carmilla’s heart and other parts have always been focused on outside distractions. Hell, Laura has probably never even seen Flashdance. Mattie reminds Carmilla that four centuries of existence should have blessed her with a little more maturity. It’s actually a pretty sisterly conversation, besides the fact that the women are both vampires and share a massive body count. Mattie can’t quite believe that Carmilla sacrificed their mother for Laura, a girl she hardly even knows. The tag line is “Love Will Have its Sacrifices,” so it’s not unexpected. Mattie then refers to Laura as both a mayfly and a snack. Never change, Mattie.

What it really boils down to is, Mattie doesn’t think Laura is good enough for her little sis. She takes her leave and of course her words have an effect on Carm. Laura comes in, and she’s all business because she can’t bear to look at Carmilla after hearing Mattie’s hurtful words. She runs off to gather Perry and LaFontaine to head for the crater, but it appears some serious damage has been done.

Laura readily admits to us that she probably should have talked it through with Carmilla, but there were demi-gods to be stopped. Also, she’s not so great with these types of confrontations. No one wants to hear that they aren’t good enough for the person they adore. In other news, the anglerfish god is up to its old tricks, and has a whole new group of brainwashed devotees.

Oh yeah, and the swat team was all up in the crater, about to bust the fish out and open some hell dimension. Like you do. The gang had to beat it once discovered, but not before LaF grabbed a bunch of samples to research. Perry turns her ire to Carmilla for not using her super strength to assist, but the earlier discussion with Mattie has Carm feeling extra sour so she leaves in a huff.

We go back to Laura filling us in on the swat team. They are part of the Corvay org. Corvay cleans up big ol’ occulty messes. Kind of like Sunshine Cleaning but for demons. Just then, the sound of rowdy co-eds fills the air, and Kirsch bursts in, dressed for the Adonis Hunt. Apparently, he didn’t realize that he would actually be hunted. Oops.

What do you think about this week’s developments?

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