“Pretty Little Liars” recap (6.7): Candy from Strangers (or Spencer)

Previously on Pretty Little Liars, Mona showed up in a denim vest to flawlessly school the Liars, Aria photographed some more dolls, and Hanna wrestled a raccoon for a Cheeto. That raccoon now has a Twitter account, and if he gets more followers than me, I’m throwing my laptop out the window.

Screen Shot 2015-07-21 at 8.28.49 PMAria, stop hashtagging and pay attention to this surgery video!

We open with Spencer and Aria googling microchips and surgical removal videos. Spencer wants to find a way to use their chip knowledge to outwit A, while Aria is touching her neck every time a text comes in. Mona has arranged for them to meet with red herring of the week Leslie, and they want Ali to come with. But Ali isn’t answering her phone. She’s on a road trip to nowhere with her dad, who is making a last ditch attempt to save (one of) his kids from Charles’s wrath. Too little too late, Mr. DiLaurentis.

Screen Shot 2015-07-21 at 8.30.43 PM He’s throwing a party and he didn’t invite me?! I like, invented him!

Hanna is just chilling at home, wearing her grandmother’s pearls and business blazer when Ashley rushes in with the mail. While Hanna was in the Dollhouse, Ashley spent all her time applying to scholarships because she never gave up hope. Who knew Boone’s Farm gave out scholarships?! It’s paid off, because now Hanna has a check for 30k from the Carissimi group (aka an A shell corp, because, come on).

Screen Shot 2015-07-21 at 8.31.52 PMWow, 30 grand? That’s like—

Screen Shot 2015-07-21 at 8.31.57 PM —a whole semester of private school! Enjoy your five months of college!

Emily is at the Brew, also waiting for Ali to call her back. Keep waiting, girl. Clare shows up looking for her. You guys remember Clare, right? She’s one of Sara’s friends that came to visit in that doppelgänger episode? I think she was their group’s Spencer? As opposed to that one chick in flannel, who we all assumed was Emily’s doppelgänger, because gay? Anyhoozle, she wants to see Sara and reconnect, but Emily bares her teeth and growls at her like a possessive puppy.

Screen Shot 2015-07-21 at 8.32.57 PM Are you here to see me? Get in line out back with the rest of those girls.