“Carmilla” recap (2.19 & 2.20): Operation

Whoever coined the phrase “be careful what you wish for” was a real jerk. However, that’s exactly what Laura is dealing with on Carmilla. She wanted Mattie gone and Vordenberg in, and with the switch in regimes comes a whole new set of rules. Rules like, your ex-girlfriend is now under arrest. Oops.

Laura tries to stand up for Carmilla but Vordernberg’s been waiting decades to put the kibosh on vampires so it’s tough luck for her. You can’t just snack on co-ed in the quad and not expect some repercussions. Carmilla finally rises from her couch to snarl some threats at Vordenberg, but his new position has given him confidence and he doesn’t quake in her presence. In fact, he threatens to behead her as she leaves. Damn, Vordernberg. Cool it, man.

Vordernberg has recruited the Summers and the Zetas to be his personal little army of vampire slayers, even equipping them with some sort of otherworldly armor. Basically, shit is getting real on campus. Laura tries to find the good in it all because she’s ever the optimist. At least the Corvae Corp isn’t going to harvest anyone’s livers this week. As she laments the way everything turned out, Vordernberg’s voice rings out a campus wide announcement, not unlike big brother. (The George Orwell version, not the reality show one.)

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 8.49.15 AMLet’s party like it’s 1984!

Vordernberg isn’t all vampire hunting all the time. He’s also trying to help the students of Silas, and sets up a trauma/recreation center on campus, where they can take a breather from all the rampaging. Oh yeah, the rampaging. Apparently, Carmilla has been kinda of going bananas, eating students, etc. Perry comes in to tell Laura that Carmilla’s animal form, the panther, has been spotted dragging bodies around campus.

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 8.53.02 AMDon’t you hate when your ex moves on so fast, turns into a giant cat and eats your classmates?

Perry tries to comfort her friend with ice cream for dinner, but Laura decides she needs a moment alone and takes a walk. LaFontaine and J.P. come downstairs to see Laura, but instead they get an awkward confrontation with Perry. Things have been icy since J.P. came into the picture, and for his part, the poor guy doesn’t know why Perry dislikes him so much. J.P., sweetie, all those years as a disembodied presence in the library has caused you to miss out on the phenomenon known as shipping. Perry tells the two that she feels like she doesn’t really have a purpose in their little group, and she’s really scared. They tell her that they are scared too, and that people all just have their own ways of dealing with fear. J.P. and his hundred years of life experience explains that life can really suck, and we aren’t always privy to why, but having people to cling to in times of great stress is better than going it alone. They all hug it out, awkwardly.

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 9.04.16 AMWell the fanfic just writes itself.

After their cuddle session, they disappear to have snacks. Laura comes back and talks to the camera again. Here’s where Laura shows her age. When Laura speaks about love, it’s this grand Austenesque way. Love conquers all, people change if they love you and if you love them hard enough. It’s all platitudes and clichés. Carmilla isn’t Mr. Darcy because Mr. Darcy doesn’t exist. Relationships are hard, and love is in the minutia of everyday life with someone. Laura will figure this out one day, but she’s still mourning the dream of what she thinks love is supposed to be, not what it actually is. Just then, Mattie bursts through the door with a dying Carmilla, who has been shot in the chest with an arrow.

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 9.11.33 AMShot through the heart and you’re to blame. You give love, a bad name.

When they get Carmilla seated, Laura’s heart nearly leaps out of her chest with concern. Mattie explains that the Summers and Zetas set up a trap and she and Carmilla walked right into it. Carmilla got hit trying to save Mattie. They give Carm a little blood to get her lucid again, and when she sees Laura, she’s less than thrilled. Mattie orders Laura to get one of the science inclined Scoobies to help remove the arrow bits but Laura puts her foot down. She refuses to help them unless Mattie promises to stop with the rampaging. Carmilla may be legit dying two feet away, but Laura, more than anything, wants to protect her friends. She always has. Mattie agrees but looks at Laura like she wishes she could rip her head off with her bare hands. Laura runs off and brings LaF, J.P. and Perry back with her. LaF looks all too excited to get to work.

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 9.48.42 AMDon’t worry, I’ve watched a lot of “Grey’s Anatomy.” Okay, I’ve watched an episode.

Perry is super pissed about Mattie and Carmilla’s arrival and goes off a tangent. She stands up to Mattie, once again accusing her of murdering the newspaper staff. Mattie denies it and you know what? I believe her. It actually seems like something she’d be upfront about.

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 9.24.33 AMLet’s just admit that we are both kind of hot for each other right now.

Perry expresses her disapproval to Laura and then leaves, just as LaF gets the arrow fragment out of Carmilla’s chest. LaF and J.P. high five over their McDreamyness, and LaF refers to surgery not unlike they are putting together and Ikea dresser. All these extra parts that you aren’t sure where they belong. Mattie rushes to Carmilla’s side, and Carmilla is surprised to hear that Laura allowed them to stay. Carmilla is disappointed that the spree is over, but Mattie says it was that or face Vordenberg’s minions again in a weakened state. Speaking of, Perry rushes in to warn them all that the minions in question are on their way and Mattie and Carmilla need to hide ASAP.

Do you think Mattie is actually innocent for the newspaper murders, or do you think Perry is on to something?