“The Fosters” (3.11) recap: The circus is back in town

And who should be making house calls at breakfast time but Monte. Sing it with me, everyone—everything is awkward! She apologizes to Lena and Stef and offers to resign if it will make Stef feel better about her lady lips kissing Lena’s lady lips.

Fosters 3114 I can’t believe you are making me sit through this Nicholas Sparks movie

Fosters 3115If Stef dies, I just want you to know I am here for you.

Callie is giving a speech about Fost and Found to a crowd of foster kids. Some kid asks Jude if Callie is for real. Oh dude, she’s as real as a baseball bat to the hood of your car. Lena wants to know what Stef thought of Monte’s offer and back at home Jesús wants to know what Emma is doing in the dining room, and she wants to know what he is doing A) with a new head and B) not in Colorado. He is completely bored by Mariana’s over-the-top Hermione Grangering about how she has to do exceptionally well on her O.W.L.s so she can get into a good college. The doorbell rings again, and it’s Lexi back with a visa and an appetite to shake things up in San Diego. Lexi and Emma eyeball each other like maybe they are going to fight over Jesús but nope, jokes on them, because this time they are fighting over Mariana.

A kid named Jack who has Goblet of Fire movie hair and Buddy Holly glasses, is asking Callie how she plans to fix every single problem in the foster care system via the app she made for her school project. Callie gets saved by Justina Marks, foster advocate, who says she’s got 50 grand she wants to invest in Callie. Beware, Callie!

At Anchor Beach, Monte walks into Lena’ office hoping for an answer. Monte can stay as long as she understands she and Lena are not friends, they are colleagues and nothing more, and frankly, Stef is a saint for being so understanding. Lena talks about “appropriate boundaries” but I am not sure she knows what that means. Monte skips out of the room safe in the knowledge she gets to keep her job and keep seeing Lena every day. I don’t want Monte anywhere near Lena’s lips again, but I so hope she sticks around for a long while.

Fosters 3116You keep saying “appropriate” but I am not sure you know what it means.

Connor is packing his stuff for LA. It’s not that he doesn’t want to stay in San Diego where he can make out with Jude, he just can’t bear to live with his dad who isn’t changing fast enough to make his life tolerable. I hope this isn’t the end of Jonnor because those kids bring a whole lot of happiness to the world.

Fosters 3117 I checked and no, I couldn’t BE any cuter.