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“Gaycation” recap (1.4): USA

It’s chillingly ironic that the finale of Gaycation, which looks at LGBTQ life in the US, aired on the same night that North Carolina Governor Pat McCrory signed a bill into law that strips away any local protections for the LGBTQ community. In a sad, desperate attempt to stay the turning tide of understanding and equality, North Carolina has taken steps to make queer and trans Carolinians, second class citizens. It’s vile, and it’s frightening, and it’s happening.

If you follow me on Twitter (@danapiccoli, plug!), then you probably know that my wife and I are leaving NYC and moving to South Carolina for her job. Now, the people we’ve met in SC have been nothing but wonderful and kind, but this news out of NC has really shaken me.

Like Ellen and Ian, I live in a place where being queer is not a big deal. I’ve always sympathized with my friends who live in places like the Bible Belt, but until I was about to move there myself, the actual magnitude of what it’s like to feel not equal and even despised, didn’t really hit me. I’m embarrassed about this fact. I have taken so much for granted. This episode of Gaycation spoke to me on a cellular level. Until we are all free to exist and live and love and-god forbid-pee in a public restroom, none of us are truly free.

Before heading to the US, Ellen and Ian head to Saskatchewan, Canada to meet with Two-Spirit members of the First Nations. They meet with Steven, who is Two-Spirit, and explains how Two Spirit is a welcoming term for any members who fall under the LGBTQ heading. Gayle, who is also Two-Spirit, tells Ian and Ellen how growing up, you just lived how you wanted to live. For Rocky, who was crowned Miss Montana Two-Spirit, it’s about having both male and female spirits inside of you, plain and simple.

Ellen and Ian are invited to participate in a Pow Wow, where they dance and celebrate the Two-Spirit community. Ellen tells us how before colonization, Two-Spirit members were considered healers and blessed individuals. When discussing how some people think that queerness and being trans are western constructs, Ellen makes a very good point. “The only western construct is only homophobia. That’s what we brought.”

The show then travels to New York Pride which was held just days after same-sex marriage was legalized across the US. It’s a beautifully happy day, and Ellen gets lots of hugs and kudos for her brave coming out the year before.

The duo meet up with Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, a data analyst who is currently analyzing data about the LGBT population in the US. Basically, his findings suggest that there are still many places where queer people are not comfortable being open about their sexuality.

Whenever there are big strides in LGBTQ equality, there is usually a backlash. Ellen brings up the religious liberty laws that have been popping up all over the country. (Right now, Georgia is mulling over this type of law and big companies like Disney and Marvel are threatening to pull out of the state if they are passed.) Where better to address the rift between religion and LGBTQ equality than the Midwest. Iowa to be exact. Ellen and Ian head to the Iowa State Fair where Sen. Ted Cruz will be speaking. While there, Ellen confronts Ted Cruz, video of which made the rounds this past summer all over the media.

Ellen and Ian also met with a traveling Christian family band called The Bontragers. They are playing at the Cruz rally and invite Ellen and Ian aboard their tour bus. The family, which consists of ten children and their parents, are all smiles. Things never get tense when Ellen and Ian bring up LGBTQ issues, but the Bontragers’ smiling faces seem glued to their faces as they bring up the same rhetoric we’ve heard a million times. Comparing same-sex couples to pedophilia and bestiality, and Mama Bontrager expressing pity for queer persons that they aren’t living God’s plan. Ellen is particularly frustrated by this.

After all that saccharin, Ellen and Ian stop by Des Moines’ oldest gay bar to talk to some folks who have been out and queer for decades, and have dealt with discrimination and the harmful effects of intolerance for years. Couple Sumitra and Donna Red Wing were on the front lines in the early ’90s when Iowa tried to introduce a bill that would change the state’s constitution and make it legal to discriminate against LGBTQ persons. Ellen brings up something that many queer folks have also brought up when it comes to this opposition from the religious right: why does it matter to you what we do? How does it affect your lives at all? The truth is, it doesn’t.

Donna tells Ellen and Ian about their friends, a lesbian couple, who dealt with something they should have never had to. One was injured and taken to the hospital, but because their union wasn’t legally recognized, they were separated, and the injured woman died without being able to see her partner. This is outrageous and all too familiar.

From Des Moines, we head to possibly the queerest and most trans friendly place in the country: San Francisco. They meet up with Syd Blakovich, an artist who currently specializes in fetish wrestling, and who some readers may recognize from her work in the Crash Pad adult film series. Syd, it turns out, was raised in a fundamentalist Christian home, and when she went to college, she discovered an entirely new world. From the insular world of fundamentalism, Syd then found herself in the world of porn, neither of which felt quite right to her. She’s finally able to express herself in the way that feels most authentic and even teaches Ellen and Ian a thing or two about wrestling.

You certainly can’t talk about San Fran without talking about activism. They meet with trans activist and legend, Miss Major to talk about her life as an activist for trans women, in a world where the average life expectancy is shocking and disturbingly low (35). Miss Major was one of the key players in the Stonewall Riots and has continued her activism for four decades. Miss Major tells them that while things have certainly improved for trans women, there is still a fear that someone may harm you anytime you leave the house.

Also, it’s the responsibility of our own community to look out for each other. “We’re a small community,” she tells Ellen and Ian. “And all we’ve got is each other. And if we don’t care about each other, then no one else is going to give a damn about us one way or the other.”

Next up is the St. James Infirmary, a beacon for the trans community, and run and specifically geared towards sex workers. From a legend like Miss Major, a new generation of activists is born. One of those activists is Star Amerasu, who works for the clinic and is putting together a database of people who have been violent towards sex workers, called the Bad Date List. This way, other sex workers can avoid these men and hopefully stay a little bit safer.

Star herself moved to San Francisco in order to have better access to health care during her transition. It’s something San Francisco is at the forefront of. While healthcare may be in much better supply in San Fran, Star explains the vicious circle that many trans women face. Trans women still face job discrimination, and without an income, some end up in the sex work industry to make ends meet. They are also often targets of law enforcement, in particular, black and Hispanic trans women. Violence is most definitely a major issue too, Star explains. Young black and Hispanic women are more likely the victims of anti-trans and “trans panic” violence and murders. It’s happening all too often and needs to stop.

“The world is going to lose some of its vibrancy with us gone,” Star tells them.

Ellen and Ian pay a visit to the family of Taja Dejesus, a young trans activist who was brutally murdered in 2015. What Taja’s mother and sister went through to find out what happened to her was pure hell and something no family should have to endure. Taja’s mother feels that if Taja hadn’t been trans and poor, that the police and media may have paid more attention to her murder. Outside, Ellen is overcome with emotions. She’s pissed and sad and everything we should all be. It goes back to Ted Cruz and people in power like him. It’s a systematic, insidious thing that is allowed to grow and thrive when fear and misunderstanding is our currency.

On a much happier note, Ellen and Ian’s next stop is Chicago where they pay a visit to the Ann and Robert H Lurie Children’s Hospital, where they have been doing groundbreaking work with young trans and gender nonconforming youth. There, children as young as three can begin seeing doctors and therapists who specialize in trans health and issues. The hospital has also become a model for many other institutions in the country. We meet 16-year-old Heather, a young trans woman who is a patient at the hospital and have been going through her transition under the care of her doctors and loving, supportive family.

We also meet Neil, who is transitioning to male and, unfortunately, does not have the support of his family like Heather does. Neil doesn’t think his family will ever accept his transition. In fact, his mother has threatened to cut Neil off if he continues his transition.

It’s back to New York to explore vogueing and the ballroom scene. Before heading to a ballroom show, Ellen and Ian meet up with Cuntmafia, an artist and performer collective in Brooklyn. One of the members, Cakes Da Killa, explains the origins of the ballroom scene and how it grew out of the need and desire to create a space to belong and a family for many disenfranchised young queer people of color. Cakes puts Ian through his paces and has him do “runway,” which is a part of ballroom. Ian isn’t too shabby, but he could stand a little more practice.

Afterward, they head to the show, which is full of good energy and excitement. “Activism isn’t always political,” Ellen says over the images of frenetic dancing. “It’s how you create family. How you create community. How you come together and empower one another.” So much yes.

The final leg of the trip takes Ellen and Ian back to their hometown, Los Angeles. It’s here, beyond the lights and the celebrity that the epidemic of homeless youth is addressed. Nearly 40% of homeless youth in LA are LGBTQ. They meet with a number these youth and their stories are all heartbreakingly similar.

The duo meets with the founders of Original Plumbing magazine, Rocco Kaiyatos and Amos Mac. Original Plumbing is a magazine dedicated to celebrating trans men, and the men talk openly about how trans men are often pushed to the margins culturally, yet experience an acceptance in society that isn’t often extended to their trans sisters.

It’s not all about the youngins, though, in this episode of Gaycation. Next we stop by a retirement home specifically dedicated to aging and elderly LGBTQ persons. It’s hella nice! Ellen and Ian get a chance to talk with the people who paved the way for us to live and love as openly as we do. From a widowed gay man to a lesbian who found a second chance at love when her longtime partner passed away, to an elderly trans woman who shares her life story over a game of bingo.

It feels right to address Ellen’s own journey from closets and unhappy to openly queer in Hollywood. They sit down with Ellen’s manager, Kelly Bush Novak, to talk about Ellen’s decision to come out in such a public way. (She can’t resist telling Ellen that her hair is a little messed up either.) Kelly is also queer and out in her life and profession. Kelly comments on the fact that Ellen has changed tremendously from the girl she met at just 20 years old. Ellen recalls the time when she was young and closeted and reading articles that speculated about her sexuality, something she found overwhelming. Kelly acknowledges that Ellen is having a very prosperous career right now, but only time will tell if that continues. It sounds bleak and kind of harsh, but it’s something that Ellen had to very much consider when she decided to be her authentic self. Hopefully, Kelly’s fears for Ellen will prove to be unwarranted.

The finale ends with Ellen, Ian and Ellen’s partner Samantha Thomas grabbing their surfboards and hitting the waves. “Of course, there’s a long way to go. That’s very, very evident,” Ellen tells us in closing. “It does feel like this massive societal shift needs to happen, which I’m hopeful will happen. And it’s because young people are moving past this. And this noise and this political rhetoric is going to disappear, and if the politicians don’t make it disappear, they are going to disappear. It can feel daunting with what we’ve seen, but it does feel like love prevails.”

This series has been incredibly enlightening, and I’m so glad Ellen Page and Ian Daniels have taken us on this trip with them. Hopefully there will be a Season 2 with more places and issues to explore. What did you think of Gaycation?

You can watch all the episodes of Gaycation now on Viceland.com.

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