“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (7.01): Things that go bump on the head

Back on the case, the crew is still stymied. But Maura has discovered something, in that nothing was found on the fire escape. Not even the dust was disturbed, which means Alice Sands probably didn’t go up it. This prompts them to search the alley again. And they realize what doesn’t go up, probably went down.

Jane probably missed it last time on account of being horrified by the thought of stepping on something gross with her bare feet. Jane goes to investigate, but the trail ends, and she comes back smelling, well, not so fresh. See, her girlfriend is out of commission for a couple of days and Jane lets herself go entirely.

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Jane goes to check up on Maura, who is sitting quietly in her office. She now has Kent at her beck and bell. Like, really, she has a bell for him. I don’t know why these two didn’t think of this system earlier for their beards. Ring a bell; he comes running. Then once you’re done, dismiss him until the next bell. Genius.

Speaking of genius, our resident genius rings for Kent again when Jane leaves. She asks for some results, but then forgets the name of the machine. A machine she could probably take apart and reassemble with her eyes closed. Oh no. Something’s wrong with Maura. I swear, writers, if it’s something terrible I will crawl through the screen and find you. They live inside the TV, right? That’s how TV works, yes?

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The team tracks down some tunnel kids who are probably working with Alice to move her drugs. Wow, she has her own Little Orphan Druggie world down there complete with a rag-tag crew of street urchins. They won’t give anything up, and then one of them walks up to Jane with a note from Alice.

Jane takes it, but then promptly rips up the note after reading. Um, shouldn’t you keep that for evidence or something? No, just going to leave it in shreds on the ground. OK, sure. That plan sounds fine, too. (I told you she gets cranky when Maura is on mental and physical activity rest.)

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Meanwhile, Maura arranged an earlier CT scan appointment at the hospital. It helps when you’re on the hospital’s advisory committee. Jane goes to find her while she is there, but finds only Kent. When Kent can’t tell her where Maura is, Jane goes all, “Bad beard! No cookie!” on him.

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Since this episode is about everyone’s relationship issues–Jane and Maura, Frankie and Nina, Korsak and Kiki–Mama R gets her turn. After she is visited by Ron’s distraught adult daughter, she decides to break up with him. Never mind that this makes literally zero sense. It happened, and now I guess Mama R has more time to plan Jane and Maura’s eventual wedding.

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