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Batwoman Recap 1.8 – Alice Finally Gets On The Naughty List

Kate tracks down Alice in her newest be-candled warehouse. She’s being kooky, throwing garments on the floor, trying to find the right outfit. How sisterly! Kate gets right to the point: Why was she working with the Rifle?

On the contrary! Alice shows Kate the coil she took out of the supergun, proving that for whatever reason, she’s still soft on her twin sister. Kate sees a photo of them on the table, and fondly picks it up. But before things can get too sentimental, Alice’s henchmen appear from behind a mirror. They were hiding among the candles and makeup like Sephora employees the whole time, just eavesdropping? So… now they know Kate is Batwoman? It feels like the plot goes down the rabbit hole every time Alice is on screen.

Jacob is kidnapped at a motel. I guess when dads are off duty in Gotham they wear premium jeans and motorcycle jackets. His voice is EXTRA gravelly this episode, like a bullfrog smoked a box of cigars, and made me grateful for the 30th time today that I’m a raging homosexual.

At the new Kane Real Estate fixer-upper, Mary begs Kate to join her at her mom’s celebration, throwing in a couture white suit to sweeten the deal. Take the deal!!!! Kate says it’s too soon to pretend to be a big happy family. Mary, in her infinite wisdom, says, “This is important to me so why can’t this be important to you since this is important to me? Especially since you gave Alice a second chance, and a third, and a fourth?” Preach! Kate basically says Alice is her real family, and Mary leaves before Kate can put her foot in her mouth more.

Kate talks to Jacob at the Crows Nest, but honey, that’s definitely not your dad, and definitely Mouse with an impossible skin mask. How does the height thing work with these impersonations? Hand size? Smell? C’mon Batwoman, wise up!

Next we see the real Jacob chained up where Beth was trapped as a kid. He gives a truly heartfelt apology for failing Beth. He says all the right things, tears streaming down his face. It seems to touch Alice, but then she snaps right back to her mad ways.

Okay, Kate wised up! After drunkenly pacing and recounting the time her dad grounded her for a month after finding a joint in her backpack, she realizes he’s not one to forgive easily, let alone his wife for such a betrayal and… IT’S NOT HIM. I love when this show lets characters be intelligent. She immediately texts the smartest woman on the show, Sophie, who’s in a meeting with her hubby and Jacob aka Mouse. Whoops, Mouse tranqs them! When they wake up hours later, Sophie realizes the only reason they’re not dead is because Kate loves her, and Alice wouldn’t cross that line.

At the Humanitarian Gala, Catherine gives her speech on stage to an eager crowd. But suddenly the teleprompter is hijacked, and she’s forced to read Alice’s message or else. Through forced words, she says that her blood money buys her this acclaim, her company puts weapons in the hands of criminals, and the Crows makes money cleaning up that mess. Her nose starts bleeding, and she faints. She’s been poisoned with a drug her company developed. Mary stays with her.

The guests get restless and try to leave, but then Alice’s henchmen (dressed as Crows) trap them. Cue Batwoman. She drops into the scene with such force that my bits got tingly. She has a new scepter and knocks the baddies into left field. She hurries to find her family.

Alice offers Catherine special healing tea if she apologizes. Catherine genuinely says that she was acting as a mother, trying to take away Kate’s pain, but it’s all her fault for fabricating Beth’s death and all the pain she experienced. Yo, what about Mouse’s sicko dad? I’m pretty sure the fault was all his.

Mary’s nose starts bleeding, too. They have to choose who drinks the tea. Mary, being her doctor self, tries to come up with another way, but Catherine, in her resolutely motherly way, makes her daughter drink. It’s heart wrenching.

Batwoman runs into an escaping Alice, who boringly blabs about her vendetta. After finding out what she’s done, Batwoman slams Alice against a wall and chokes her. Hard. The look in her eyes is one the Bat has had to grapple with throughout the canon. But then she lets go.

A dying Catherine tells Mary that she wishes she could have seen her work at her secret clinic. Yes, of course she knows! She jokes, “The fastest way for you to stop doing something is for me to approve of it.” They tearfully chuckle. Then, with her last breath, she says, “Mary, you’re the one thing I did right. Nothing makes me prouder than having raised you.”

The real Jacob is framed for her murder. Sorry, bud.

Hours later, a stunned Mary takes a visceral step back from a consoling Kate, coolly saying, “you’re the last person who could bring me comfort right now.” Her mom died slowly, in pain, exactly how Alice planned. Again Mary asks if Alice is worth it, and finally Kate says, “No.” But it’s too late.

At the Crows Nest, Sophie fights for Jacob’s innocence. It pains me to say it, but Tyler is a good husband. He says what he wants out of a relationship and encourages Sophie to figure herself out, because it’s clear she loves him but isn’t in love with him.

Visiting her dad in jail, with wild eyes and furrowed brows, Kate says, “I hate her so much,” and that when he gets out and puts Alice down, “This time I won’t stop you.”

Damn this episode was dark.

But-!!

Wait-!

Before, we get answers, Kate is whisked away to another universe. Yes, you heard me right. As part of the CW’s Crisis on Infinite Earths five-episode crossover series, Batwoman fights among the Arrowverse’s greatest heroes. Kate adds that sassy, disgruntled spice you need on every great team. They’re up against the greatest threat any of them have faced: the end of life as we know it. A massive anti-matter wave is destroying all planets in all universes in all timelines, and the only hope lies in the Seven Paragons, people that represent ultimate virtues. And our very own Kate is one of them! Batwoman is the paragon of Courage.

She has some serious friendship chemistry with Supergirl (paragon of Hope) as they go on a side-quest to a future Gotham City where a decrepit old Batman has turned bitter and evil, resorting to killing his villains, including that world’s Superman! When he tries to kill our Supergirl with kryptonite, Kate kicks the crap outta him without blinking. He dies saying, “there’s no hope.” Kate disagrees, and sets the tone for what the Bat of the Future can be. And for what it’s worth, in this timeline, Beth is alive and well, and the two sisters are together as adults, happy.

The crossover event also features Supergirl’s sister Alex Danvers, a lesbian with a fresh fade whose coming out story is, according to this AE review, one of the few portrayed with dignity and nuance. There’s also genius-babe Lena Luther who is straight (??) but has INTENSE chemistry with Supergirl (it’s honestly off the charts), and bisexual Sara Lance, who brings BIG top energy to The Legend’s of Tomorrow. Fun fact, Sara and Alex slept together a few crossovers ago. Dreams can come true!

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