The AfterEllen.com Fall TV Preview
It’s that time again! Fall TV season is finally upon us, and we’ve got your one-stop guide to all the lesbian and bisexual characters and actresses who will make appearances on primetime this season. So take a look, and then sit sit back, relax and pass us that popcorn. (Unless you’re planning to watch Jackie Warner or Jillian Michaels, in which case we’ll just share an apple.)
ThinterventionAmerica’s Next Top ModelWhen: Monday, September 6 (10pm)
Where: Bravo
Why we care: Jackie Warner’s Work Out was our guilty pleasure. We pretended to watch it for traning tips, but we were really in it for Jackie’s dating shenanigans.
The least you need to know: The last time we saw Jackie Warner on Bravo, she was kickboxing atop Sky Sport in the setting Los Angeles sun. She was pissed about a breakup.
HellcatsWhen: Wednesday, September 8 (8pm)
Where: CW
Why we care: Cycle 15 includes lesbian contestant Kayla, a former Hooters waitress.
The least you need to know: Last cycle, a model got knocked off the runway by a giant swinging pendulum. You never know if this will be the season when Tyra’s hijinks actually get somebody killed.
Rules of EngagementWhen: Wednesday, September 8 (9pm)
Where: CW
Why we care: Lesbian cheerleader, Patty “The Wedge” Wedgerman.
The least you need to know: Patty is a “ballsy, fearless and cheerfully profane” cheerleader for the Hellcats squad. She’s a great cheerleader, and she’s cute as hell. But maybe she’s just not “Captain” material.
HouseWhen: Monday, September 20 (8:30pm)
Where: CBS
Why we care: We almost don’t.
The least you need to know: CBS flunked their GLAAD report card. Hard. So they’ve decided to add a lesbian to the cast – just another woman who won’t sleep with David Spade.
GleeWhen: Monday, September 20 (8pm)
Where: Fox
Why we care: AfterEllen.com number one hottie, Olivia Wilde.
The least you need to know: Bisexual super doctor Thirteen will not be making out with any chicks unless it’s Sweeps. And even then, the scene might get pulled right before it’s set to air.
The Biggest LoserWhen: Tuesday, September 21 (8pm)
Where: Fox
Why we care: Uh, Brittana. Faberry. Kurt Hummel. Emmy Award winner Jane Effing Lynch!
The least you need to know: They sing. They dance. Sometimes there’s a plot. Sometimes not so much. But just when you least expect it, you’ll find yourself bawling your eyes out. (See: season one finale.)
Criminal MindsWhen: Tuesday, September 21 (8pm)
Where: NBC
Why we care: We got this muffin recipe out of Jillian Michaels’ latest cookbook and it’s kind of delicious.
The least you need to know: Musical montages of strangers’ successes are oddly moving.
FringeWhen: Wednesday, September 22 (9pm)
Where: CBS
Why we care: Out actress Kirsten Vangsness stars as Penelope Garcia.
The least you need to know: We’re still a little hacked off about losing A.J. Cook and about the rumored slashing of Paget Brewster’s screen time in the coming season. But Vangsness is still a series regular, and she’ll be starring in a spin-off, Criminal Minds: Suspect Behavior, which premieres in 2011.
Grey’s AnatomyWhen: Thursday, September 23 (9pm)
Where: Fox
Why we care: Out actress Jasika Nicole stars as Astrid Farnsworth.
The least you need to know: Astrid is Olivia’a assistant, a junior FBI agent who spends long days dorking out in the lab with her varied and incredibly sexy skill set.
OutlawWhen: Thursday, September 23 (8pm)
Where: ABC
Why we care: Calzona, baby!
The least you need to know: Sara Ramirez and Jessica Capshaw‘s Callie and Arizona are the only lesbian couple on primetime. Last season they almost split up over a super original “Baby: yes/no” storyline, but they got it together in the finale. It’s never smooth sailing at Seattle Grace, but they’ve already survived a psychotic gunman, and the parking lot.
Stargate UniverseWhen: Friday, September 24 (10:00pm)
Where: NBC
Why we care: Carly Pope plays a bisexual private investigator.
The least you need to know: Jimmy Smits plays a Supreme Court justice who quits the bench to “represent the little guy.” Pope’s character, Lucinda Pearl, will work for him.
The Good WifeWhen: Thursday, September 28 (9pm)
Where: SGU
Why we care: Lesbian IOA officer Camile Wray.
The least you need to know: Camile Wray is the de facto civilian leader aboard Destiny. After being listed as a recurring character and then a guest star in the credits, Ming-Na has received main cast status going into the second season. And the trailer from Comic-Con is insane.
The TalkWhen: Tuesday, September 28 (10pm)
Where: CBS
Why we care: Archie Panjabi just snagged an Emmy for her portrayal of maybe-gay Kalinda.
The least you need to know: Good Wife creator Robert King told us Kalinda’s sexuality would be a little less ambiguous this season. He said he wants to “go there” with Kalinda and another woman, but he doesn’t want it to be a stunt.
When: Monday, October 18 (2pm)
Where: CBS
Why we care: Out lesbian Sara Gilbert brings the gay to the discussion about family and politics and entertainment.
The least you need to know: Saturday Night Live is going to have a field day with The Talk vs. The View.
What show are you most looking forward to this fall?