“Grey’s Anatomy” minicap: “Can’t Fight Biology”

Welcome back, Grey’s Anatomy fans, to Season 7, Episode 4: "Can’t Fight Biology."  Actually, you can fight biology. I fought biology during my junior year and lost with a D+. Biology is a bitch!

Since all the doctors on this show live together, morning means too many people crammed into one bathroom. Lexi is shaving her pretty legs, Avery is taking a shower and Alex is brushing his teeth and pushing April away from the mirror while she’s trying to do her hair.

Meredith and Derek poke their heads into the bathroom (a la Mr. and Mrs. Mike Brady) to watch the chaos. Derek says to Meredith, “You know, this isn’t normal?” THANK YOU!  Finally someone is addressing the elephant in the room, now all of you need to MOVE OUT!

Callie and Arizona are getting their freak on (thank you, Shonda Rhimes!), so Mark has to knock on their bedroom door. Callie forgot that she and Mark are supposed to work out and Arizona replies, “This is just like working out, just more fun.” The impatient Mark busts through the door, sees the naked Calzona in action and says, “Nice!” My sentiments exactly! Lock you door ladies. Or at least put a sock on the doorknob.

Owen and Cristina are house hunting. Their realtor takes them to an old fire station that, with a lot of work, can be converted into a home. (Is that legal and up to code?) Owen likes the place, while Cristina seems completely disinterested.  The best is when Cristina checks out the fireman’s pole in disgust.

Even though I know Cristina and Owen are an imaginary couple, I still worry that if they ever have an imaginary kid that he or she might accidentally fall through the fireman pole hole in the floor and get injured. Good thing Cristina and Owen are both doctors.

Speaking of kids, the McDreamys are at an obstetrician’s office trying to figure out how to make a McBaby. The doctor comes in (she resembles Lisa Ling. I love Lisa Ling!) and tells the McDreamys there are some “issues” that they need to discuss. Meredith learns that she has a "hostile" uterus, which might have caused her miscarriage and might cause another one in the future. Derek tries to calm her down and Meredith snaps back, “How would you feel if she called your penis angry or snide?” Personally, I’d be pissed! And very confused.

Derek puts it all in perspective, “The important thing is that you’re healthy. Just think of all the fun we’re going to have trying now.” I just flashed back to the puppet sex scene from the film Team America. Do yourself a favor and watch it!

Chief Weber pages Dr. Bailey and tells her that he needs to take her clinic and turn it into a Bariatric center. Lap-bands for everyone! Seattle Grace has been in survival mode since the shootings and they desperately need to make money. Bailey gets pissed and says, “It’s my turn to have Cristina Yang on my service. That’s all the fight I have in me today.” Bailey, I’ll happily take Cristina off your hands and service her for you.

Meredith and Cristina compare their lives: Hostile Uterus vs. House Hunting with Hubby Owen. Cristina says she is taking baby steps by referring to Owen as her “husband.”  Lexi interrupts and asks when April and Avery are moving out. Lexi finds April to be too annoying to live with. Cristina, being Cristina, turns to Lexi and says, “Really? I find you much more annoying.” I love Cristina. 

Just then April flies by screaming that a car ran into a laundromat and there are multiple traumas to tend to. Yep, she is annoying and loud. OK, Seattle Grace staff, let’s go work on our traumas. This is a hospital, isn’t it? Meredith heads towards the ambulances and asks Cristina if she’s coming along. Cristina replies, “Baby steps don’t include multiple traumas.” Take your time Cristina. And take your top off. Who wrote that?