Wynonna Earp S2. E6: Cat’s Out of the Bag

Back on the homestead, Wynonna doesn’t really want to talk about being pregnant with Waverly, who’s toting off the assorted cutlery that made up Mictian’s magpie pile o’ junk lightening attractor from the barn. Wynonna is still processing Luchado having her head blown off, Dolls being “a lizard. Or a tiny super sexy dragon” (LOL), and the fact that how can she be pregnant with demons still running rampant around Purgatory? Also, global warming. She should worry about that as well, although maybe that’s a good thing for ice cold Purgatory.

At the Gardiner house, a possessed Not Mercedes Gardiner is throwing rings on a map like runes. The two black fog ghosts are looking for the location of the second seal, which Bobo Del Rey moved. He died before he told anyone where he moved it, however, and the ghosts have few options regarding who else to ask and even less time to find it. They settle on a demon named Hypnos the Clockmaker, because someone with that name would DEFINITELY know where a secret seal would be.

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Is the Knows the Answer To All Questions demon still around? He might know.

Hypnos, it turns out, is sedated most of the time to keep him asleep. His mansion is protected by warding spells to keep non-human intruders out, but this turns out to be a HUGE security oversight when Tucker Gardiner, wearing a ski mask and toting a shotgun, walks in unimpeded and wakes him up. “The Widows,” as Hypnos calls the black fog ghosts who accompany Tucker, want time. Hypnos is all like, “Shucks, you got me. Okay.”

At the sheriff’s office, a distraught nun describes finding the priest and the Victorian woman in black eating him. Wynonna waaay too quickly deduces that: 1) the commonality between the condo where she last saw the ghost and this church is that both are consecrated ground, 2) the black fog ghost was looking for another seal, and 3) this other seal must still be out there and they’re all screwed if the ghost gets it before they do.

Doc and Dolls show up just then with the picture of the ghost and to relay the news that Black Badge is gone and they’re now all “free agents,” as it were. The two men take a moment to figuratively mark their territory around Wynonna: Dolls wants back in the game, but Doc is calling dibs. Dolls invites Wynonna out to coffee and Wynonna looks super enamored…uh, by the idea, until Waverly is like, “Wynonna, you’re pregnant and resuming a love triangle at this time would make it even more awkward since you haven’t told anyone yet. And also, that baby is coming out with a mustache and a black cowboy hat and you KNOW IT.” And Wynonna is like, “I do what I want.”

Using Math, Jeremy has figured out where the second seal is, but who cares because Waverly and Nicole are making out in Waverly’s bedroom. Nicole is worried that she had sex with Mictian the Tentacle Demon when Waverly was possessed and that The Feelings Waverly shared with her at that time were actually the demon talking, but Waverly assures her that it was always her.

The so-cute-it’s-gross kissing ends, however, before anything gets past G rated and we find Wynonna meeting Dolls for coffee. “Damn,” he says, “I missed you, like, so much.” Shakespeare just rolled in his grave. The Wynonna/Dolls reunion is cut short, however, by the appearance of Not Mercedes, who is acting a little funny and complaining too much about Tucker. Moments later, everyone in the café slumps in their seats, knocked out.

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Actually, in retrospect Not Mercedes’ appearance here did not contribute to the plot in any way.

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