Previously on Wynonna Earp, Willa was revealed to be not dead but brainwashed and returned to her sisters and started to get her memories back, Waverly was generally wary of her oldest sister, the homestead got attacked, and Waverly got grazed by a bullet which prompted her to ask if chicks dig scars, and Bobo inexplicably saved Willa’s life.
After Wynonna and Willa interrogate Whiskey Jim and finding out that the Revenants felt a surge when Willa turned 27, and needing more information, Dolls tries to hypnotize Willa, even though she’s kind of hostile about it. She remembers flashes, of origami swans, of being taken, of Wynonna shooting their dad. Willa cries and Wynonna looks like she wants something to punch but unable to hit memories, she instead says she’s glad the first Revenant she killed was the one who physically took Willa. Everyone having had enough for one day, Dolls says he’ll have Officer Haught drive her home.
Officer Haught goes above and beyond her call of duty and goes inside the Earp homestead to dress Waverly’s bullet wound (because chicks dig scars) and Willa storms in and scolds her for doing it wrong and using POISON (aka medicine) and says that for the past two days, Willa has been redressing Waverly’s wound after Nicole left. Which obviously Waverly hadn’t mentioned.
Willa continues to be hostile so Waverly tells her to “pop out” which makes Nicole smirk and repeat that she’ll “pop out” like they’re talking in the cutest secret code ever. Once she’s gone, Willa apologizes if she’s being rude, because she’s still adjusting to human interaction, and Waverly says she’ll be here for her while she figures it all out.
Wynonna and Dolls are still trying to figure out who tried to kill him, and Wynonna suggests that it’s Doc, but Dolls knows that’s not Doc’s style. They have a tattoo clue, and they work together to figure out that it’s a group called the Machetes, and are pretty proud of their teamwork.
At Shorty’s Bobo is psychologically torturing the judge he has under his thumb and telling a twitchy guy in a gas mask who is making a woman tear her own face off to dial it back 5% for their plan to be perfect. And let me tell you that 5% less than tearing your own face off is still not a place I’d like to be, so he’s obviously up to no good.
Back at the Homestead, we find out that “pop out” meant “meet me in the barn” because Waverly and Nicole are sitting in there now. Waverly says, “I’m exhausted,” in a very defeated voice, so Nicole comes to her side and says, “I know, baby,” kissing her on the neck and running her hands through her hair.
Then Waverly turns to her girlfriend, and they kiss, and it’s the Most Beautiful Kiss.
Then the music ups its tempo and Waverly pulls Nicole’s shirt off. Nicole pulls Waverly’s off right back. Waverly runs her hand through her hair to push it off her face and it flows like a magical waterfall. Their kisses are gentle but hungry and Waverly is smiling into a kiss when suddenly Nicole pulls back because Willa is at the door.
Willa is surprised and says that Wynonna didn’t mention that Waverly was “a gay” (something they apparently didn’t talk about much in the cult) – which is interesting phrasing because it wasn’t “YOU didn’t tell me” – but from the look on Waverly’s face Willa realizes that Wynonna doesn’t even know.
Nicole grabs her shirt, tells Waverly to call her later and gives Willa EPIC side-eye before leaving. And what I loved about it was that Nicole wasn’t embarrassed that they were caught, and she didn’t even attempt to cover herself up until she was already past Willa, she was mostly just annoyed they were interrupted.
Just kidding, did you really think I was going to describe that scene without a gif? Here ya go!
Anyway, as soon as Nicole leaves, Willa immediately looks like a wolf who has cornered new pray and says that Wynonna would be pissed if she found out Waverly was keeping this from her and Waverly rolls her eyes; she’s been blackmailed by Willa before. When they were little, once Willa made Waverly walk across a beam in the barn in exchange for not telling their dad that Waverly was snooping. Waverly has only a handful of memories of her older sister, and one of them is her putting her life in danger to keep a secret. It’s really no wonder she doesn’t trust full grown Willa if 12-year-old Willa was already that manipulative.
Wynonna and Dolls go to talk to the Machetes and find out that there are some Revenants among them. They fight and Wynonna ends up with one at the end of Peacemaker and has a new sassphrase: “Welcome aboard the Eapr Express, enjoy your trip to hell.” But it ended up being anticlimactic because Peacemaker shorted out instead of shooting.
Dolls’ guy confesses that the judge is the one who ordered the hit on Dolls, but they didn’t ask why; they just took the cash. Dolls takes it back and Wynonna is bummed she can’t buy new leather jackets or pimp out her bike because they’re donating it to charity. Dolls takes the time to tell Wynonna how far she’s come from being the crazy chick with a gun when they first met, and at first I thought it was kind of out of character, but then I realized that this is exactly what Wynonna needs right now, regular reassurance that she’s still useful, still needed, now that Willa’s back. And Dolls gets that. The compliments make Wynonna a little uncomfortable so she tries to change the subject but Dolls has something serious to show her. He takes her to see a burnt out pink Cadillac.
Dolls is sure Doc is fine; Wynonna isn’t so sure.
At the Homestead, Willa finds herself drawn to the edge of the property and finds an origami swan like the one in her hypnotism vision. Bobo is there, and their hands are about to touch when a shot hits the swan out of their hands. It’s Waverly, threatening to bring the pain.
Bobo runs off, and Waverly hugs her sister, and they exchange apologies. Willa tells Waverly about the paper swans and says she doesn’t know what it means but Waverly (being the smartest one) actually might.
The gas-masked Revenant, called Bubba, has Doc prisoner. Doc is a smooth talker and manages to keep Bubba laughing and keep himself alive, promising knife throwing lessons for answers to his questions. Though the first one doesn’t inspire confidence, since he asks how long Bubba will keep him, and he says until everyone’s gone.
Wynonna and Dolls go to Shorty’s and see Judge Cryderman inside about to hang himself. The judge admits that the hit was Bobo’s idea and that he’s throwing a party and obsessed with getting the lead back. Wynonna puts her authoritative voice on and demands that he get them into the party when Dolls is like, “Literally everyone was invited.”
Wynonna and Dolls start to leave, but as soon as their backs are turned, Cryderman shoots himself in the head.
Meanwhile, Doc tricks Bubba into telling him what he’s planning, complimenting the poison’s peachy smell, and tries to play it cool when the poison makes a prisoner in a box foam at the mouth, lose his damn mind, and stab himself over and over.
Out in what looks like the middle of nowhere, Waverly takes Willa to a swan reservoir, probably not too far from where Delphine Cormier has been all this time, and they come across a treehouse that Willa recognizes.
They go up to the treehouse, and there are dusty books and paper swans and a tree Willa remembers clinging to as the Stone Witch stole her memories. But those memories are starting to come back to her, including memories of Bobo being there from when she was very young. Then she says there’s so much to do, looking creepier than ever before.
Willa heads down and Waverly gets a call from Dolls, asking for her dress size, which confuses the hell out of her.
Dolls gives Wynonna a dress and she’s like, “Sweet tell me all the secret spy things about it,” and when he says it’s just a dress, she laughs at him and says she can get a dress on her own thank you very much. Willa and Waverly show up and give them the update on the swan reservoir and Bobo and Constance Clootie and the memory of their dad making a deal with Bobo, promising him the lead. They’re nervous about going to this party outnumbered, but Willa says that three Earps are better than an army, and Waverly has dealt with worse. (To which Wynonna says, “Why bring Champ into this?” amusing Waverly greatly.)
Wynonna wants to make a plan, and they all agree that they can’t just go in guns blazing. *wipes tear* They grow up so fast.
Bubba gives the poison to a messenger to take to Bobo’s party, and while they’re chatting, Doc manages to free himself and kills Bubba dead. His first stop is going to be that party.
While the rest of her team heads to the party, Wynonna goes to the barn and wades through her memory of her dad and Bobo talking and remembers hiding a letter for her father. She finds it now and reads it, and now she knows where the lead is.
At the party, Waverly walks down the stairs looking like a mermaid.
She smiles at Nicole, who looking amazing herself and going full head-dip upon seeing Waverly.
Nicole gives Waverly her bracelet and Waverly says that if they survive this party, they should dress up more often. Nicole finds the that a little alarming, but Waverly just tells her to stay by the exit before Willa calls her over.
Champ the Chump had been watching this exchange, and as soon as Waverly is gone, he and his tuxedo T-shirt drunkenly stumbles up to Nicole, getting in her face and saying that she and Waverly together are disgusting. She doesn’t waver; she just stands her ground as he scowls at her and chugs more champagne.
Waverly tells Willa about the 15 vents she counted and everything she’s scoped out about the party, but Willa isn’t interested, she tries to get Waverly to drink the champagne and says they should just relax and enjoy the party. They go to the coat room where Wynonna climbs in the window with Pacemaker and gives her sisters the letter she found.
Armed with this new knowledge, Wynonna heads into the party, wearing a red dress and proving she can do a damn fine job picking out her own dress.
Wynonna shows Dolls the letter and explains that it’s Wyatt talking about the curse and the Ghost River Triangle. If the Earp Heir walks across the border with the Revenants during the winter solstice, willingly, they can leave the triangle. Their father was going to do it to save his daughters, but then the attack on the homestead happened, and their plans went to hell in a handbasket. So now, Willa is the lead. But also what this means is that there can only be one proper heir, and Wynonna isn’t it.
Wynonna’s first instinct is to hide Willa, but she doesn’t want to leave, and Waverly knows running isn’t the answer. Though Willa is still acting super shady and still trying to get everyone to drink even though she puts down her glass herself.
Champ is chasing Haught across the room shouting about her stealing his girl, and she tells him to a) STFU because he’s going to out Waverly to everyone and b) STFU because Waverly isn’t an object and therefore cannot be stolen. Champ is like blah blah feminism when Waverly comes down the stairs and yells at him for being a drunk, homophobic asshole. He slurs that it’s BS that she told him that it was okay he failed the police entrance exam but then ended up dating a cop anyway. Nicole looks worried for Waverly, since there are other people on the stairs with them who definitely heard that.
But Sheriff Nedley plays it cool and says that this is Waverly and Nicole’s private business. Champ starts literally foaming at the mouth and launches himself at Waverly, but Nedley steps in front of her to protect her. Champ turns on Nicole but she has been waiting since the pilot for an excuse to clock him, so she’s ready with a punch to the jaw and handcuffs before Champ can even take a swing. Waverly is hella turned on by this.
Wynonna isn’t drinking for once because she hates champagne, and repeats that Willa is the true heir. Dolls tries to comfort her, but she tells him that Peacemaker glitched on her during the Machete fight. She says she’s going to have to go back to being a “plain old human” (then apologizes to Dolls as though he is human, which, joke’s on her). Wynonna didn’t ask for this and doesn’t it figure that just as she was starting to embrace it—enjoy it, even—it’s being taken away from her? Dolls assures her she’s anything but a plain old human and still the best deputy he could ask for. Wynonna kisses him, and I’m not even going to lie to you, my heart did a lil’ flip, but as soon as they pull apart, Doc is standing there. He swipes some champagne, ready to drink away his jealousy, but as soon as he smells peaches, he realizes what’s going on. He tells Wynonna they have to stop everyone from drinking the champagne, but Bobo struts in to tell them himself.
He tells everyone that he poisoned the bubbly and that he’ll give the antidote to whoever brings him Wynonna Earp, dead or alive.
They all start to zombie walk to Wynonna and Waverly runs to her sister. Wynonna tells her to get Willa out of there, so she does. Waverly runs into Nicole and tells her to come with them, but Nicole is a cop, so she’s going to run toward the danger, not away from it. To which Waverly adorably responds, “God, that’s sexy.” Making Nicole giggle.
They hold the most beautifully intense eye contact and have a quick exchange, promising each other they didn’t have any champagne, and that everything is going to be okay. Waverly finally can’t hold it in anymore and grabs the back of Nicole’s head and pulls her in for a kiss. Right there in the middle of the chaos, right in front of everyone, because she wasn’t seeing or hearing a damn soul besides Nicole in that moment.
And I’m going to take a quick left turn to talk about something, one of the many, many things I love about the way this relationship has been written. The very first time Officer Haught strolled into Shorty’s, all swagger and smirks, I was swooning as much as Waverly, but a teeeeeny part of me got worried. Not because of anything the show did, but because I’ve been burned before, I worried that Nicole was going to come across as a “predatory lez,” coming onto Waverly stronger and stronger until she broke up with her boyfriend or cheated on him with her, giving the appearance of “turning” her or something.
But that’s because it was only the second episode and I didn’t know how much trust I could have in this show. Because actually what happened was Nicole made her feelings clear, but didn’t smother Waverly with them. She kept her distance, while befriending Waverly, willing to have any relationship Waverly was most comfortable with. Her issue with Champ wasn’t that he was a guy or that he was dating Waverly, it was that he wasn’t treating Waverly right, and she let that be known, too.
Every single first move has been Waverly’s to make. The first “conversation” (though that didn’t go very well, due to signal crossing), the first kiss in Nedley’s office, actually both kisses in Nedley’s office, the clothing removal in the barn, and then the first public kiss. All of them were on Waverly’s terms. Because Nicole knows who she is and who she wants, and she knows Waverly’s still working all that out. And she knows Waverly has spent her entire life having other people try to tell her who she is and what she wants. So she’s letting Waverly test out her own wings and is just happy to be along for the ride. Smiling that “how did I get so damn lucky” smile every time Waverly chooses her—which she does, Waverly chooses her over and over and over.
Anyway. Nicole tells Waverly to get to safety and they realize Willa ran off while they were kissing. Nicole looks pretty salty about it.
Where did Willa run to, you ask? Well, the real question is, WHO did Willa run to? The answer is Bobo. He calls her baby and she says she remembers him now and calls him Robert and for a multitude of reasons including how young she was in one of those flashbacks with Bobo I just have to say: EWWWWWWWWWWW.
Also, it’s almost the solstice, and they’re walking off hand in hand, and I just don’t think this can end well for any of us.
What did you think of “House of Memories”? What are you hoping to see in the finale on Friday?
Here are some of our favorite #HaughtDamn tweets from this week:
I’m still in aww of @DominiqueP_C‘s hair flip. WHAT MAGIC IS THIS?! #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Call Me Root (@CloneNic) 18 June 2016
I AM TRYING REALLY HARD TO LIKE YOU WILLA!! But then you gotta go & be mean to Nicole!!! #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Adrienne. (@legacymermaid) 18 June 2016
Nicole punching Champ is my new sexuality,I can’t with this woman,she makes me feel things #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn #WayHaught @KatBarrell
– WAYHAUGHT (@HotForHaught) 18 June 2016
lemme just rewind haught punching that fuckstick a few times #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Awesome (@groceryfiend) 18 June 2016
DAMN! Nicole’s been waiting to take Champ out ever since he slobbered all over Waverly at the memorial. #WynonnaEarp #WayHaught #HaughtDamn
– Lady Liberty (@CindyLMarshall) 18 June 2016
“Hey Nicole you look like a goddess in that dress. Aphro-date-me?”
-Waverly (probably) #wayhaught #WynonnaEarp #haughtdamn
– paint the brain (@paint_the_brain) 18 June 2016
“I know baby” the sound I just made. The neighbor’s dogs just started barking #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Jerzey (@jerzeyredhead) 18 June 2016
WILLA I HATE YOU MORE FOR INTERUPTING THAT. But you “being a…gay” SLAYED ME #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Jessica Buonocore (@jayelkru) 18 June 2016
“I know baby” IM AHHAKAVAGJAVA #WynonnaEarp #WayHaught #Haughtdamn
– mena (@hedabaeman) 18 June 2016
Whenever Haught has her hair down my gawd #HaughtDamn #WynonnaEarp
– Jenny (@jgalaisa) 18 June 2016
All I want in this life is for someone to look at me the way Nicole Haught looks at Waverly Earp. #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn #WayHaught
– Nik (@njnic23) 20 June 2016
