“The Returned” recap (1.3): Day of the Dead

After the funeral, Claire and Lena (who has apparently been taking classes at The Rosewood School of Funeral Attire and Etiquette—a crop top and a leather skirt? Come on, girl.) tell Peter that Camille might not be the only Returned One. Lena begrudgingly fills them in about her encounter with Simon, before running off in a fit of angst over Camille.

Julie’s stupid fucking neighbor gossips with her about Lucy’s stabbing (not knowing that Julie was a previous victim), which triggers a minor panic attack in Julie. Go step on a lego, Neighbor Lady. Nikki watches Julie leave, clearly concerned, but does not try to stop or follow her.

Elsewhere in town, a young man is looking for his mother, so he breaks into a house. Okay. Well, he’s probably Returned, so I’m sure we’ll come back to that later.

Back at the twins’ house, Camille convinces her dad to give her a cigarette, because, like, what’s the worst that could happen? She’s going to die? Lol, zombie humor. Jack is making a run for the title of Worst Parent (which his estranged wife currently holds), by giving his daughter a smoke and then telling her that she’s basically the reason he and Claire are separated. Parenting!

photo3“After this, we can try heroin and I’ll you what really happened the day we took your dog to the farm!”

Lena and Claire get home just as Jack and Camille are making quesadillas, but Lena’s not hungry. She goes to her room to change for class (she’s allegedly a “student”), and Camille follows her. Camille apologizes for destroying Lena’s room and Lena semi-apologizes for being terrible to Camille since she’s returned. Camille calls her twin sister really pretty (“So you agree, you think you’re really pretty?”), before asking if there are a lot of guys into her. She asks specifically about Ben, who was the boy Lena banged on the day of the bus accident way back when. Camille notices a cut on Lena’s back, which freaks Lena out a lot more than I expected it to. Girl drinks all the damn time—this can’t be the first random cut or bruise she’s found on her body, can it?

Meanwhile, Peter flirts with the police station secretary and sweet talks her into releasing Simon into his custody. (Elton from Clueless, you old so and so.) Peter is driving Simon to the community center, so he can provide him with a hot meal and a bed (and will probably study him for science, IDK). Simon asks about Rowan, and Peter blows his load about knowing that Simon is Returned because he knew someone like him years ago. Simon’s like, “Uh, you’re weirdly cool about this whole situation, let me out of the car.”

Nikki shows up at Julie’s apartment to let her know about the recent attack, and also to see how she’s doing. Julie is like, “Thanks for your concern, but you haven’t come to see me in seven years, so bye.” Hold up. Seven years? Nikki, WTF? So, let me run through the logic: your girlfriend gets brutally attacked. You try to be there for her, but she tells you she needs some space. ::nodding:: Sure, okay, give her some space—BUT NOT FOR SEVEN YEARS. Come on, dude.

photo4“So, you’re saying I’m late, or…?”

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