“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (7.07): Don’t Fence Me In

At Quantico, Jane is joking with Mr. F-Beard-I about J. Edgar Hoover’s fabulous dress and high-heel collection. Before going into the class, she overhears one of the male trainees complaining that they couldn’t find “one guy” to teach this thing. Sadly, little Donald Trumps are everywhere.

Jane is in front of the class, flailing a bit as she tries to reach the youths by simply lecturing. Ever the hands-on lady (as Maura can attest), she decides to get interactive and sets up faux interrogations with the students instead. She grills them one by one giving them all the patented Det. Jane Rizzoli treatment, minus the shootings.

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She gets them to confess they’ve Dirty Harry-ed with their fake gun in the mirror, worn their underwear for multiple days without washing and using a nightlight. The mini-Trump is miffed (he was the night light needer) and tries a classic misogynistic male power play, calling her seminar “cute.” Then he drops his pencil on purpose and expects Jane to pick it up, with a wink. Oh, Lil’ Trump.  Jane Rizzoli is about to fuck up your everything. And guess what? I’m with her.

The case glides on with the added wrinkles of a victim who was a meth maker, a gangster who got lipo and a bomb made of melted human fat removed during plastic surgery. Yeah, Jane is definitely missing out on a good one. Like, I can hear her in their next Skype session already. “Mauuuura. A fat bomb? Please, please, please can we make a fat bomb when I get back? Pleeeease.”

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Mama R is still on her pointless apartment hunt. It isn’t going well. But then, once you’ve lived at the Isles Estate everything else looks like a flophouse. Frankie tries to talk her out of it, because he knows Jane secretly loves that Maura has taken in their mother. He is a big Rizzles shipper, like the rest of us.

And, as if on cue, our couple emerges again. Jane Skypes Maura again–but Maura immediately recognizes that she has “Case Face” on. Girlfriends know all of each other’s faces–it’s a fact. Jane admits she is preoccupied with Lil’ Trump and The Case of the Possibly Murderous Misogynist. She has looked into the asshat’s past and found an award-winning and talented female journalist at his college newspaper who committed suicide. He was the editor and only published two of her articles.

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So now Jane is on a mission to stop this sexist possible murderer from receiving his badge, gun and federal authority. Look, guys, if you want to make all the rest of the cases about Jane taking down misogynistic dillweeds, I’m all for it. Go out in a blaze of feminism, show. And sweet lady kisses, please let there be sweet lady kisses.