“Coronation Street” recap: Muggles and O.W.L.S.

Last time: Sophie’s mum forbade Sophie from seeing Sian on account of the whole hoodlums-on-the-run thing they did at the music festival. And so Sophie and Sian joined the church choir so they could hook up in God’s house — because they don’t call it "getting to know someone Biblically" for nothing. (Wherein "hook-up" = "eyeshag," by the way.)

This time: The entire Webster family is sitting around the table waiting for Sophie’s GCSE exam results to be texted to her. I can’t really speak intelligently about the British school system because everything I know about it comes from Harry Potter, but I think this is pretty normal, right? I mean, Harry, Ron and Hermione waited for their O.W.L.S. like this, and Hermione clutched onto the boys’ arms so hard it made them bleed. Sophie’s not doing that, though. She’s mellow. Because she’s Sophie.

When her results come through, she can’t look at them because she’s too nervous, so Rosie — in true sisterly fashion — scoops up the phone and squeals about how she made all As and A-stars (A-pluses?), except for one B in Religious Studies. Rosie kisses Sophie on the cheek because she’s glad she’s not actually perfect, and says, "There is a God!" Sophie goes, "That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you." And, you guys, I really hope they explore this God/gay thing. I think, just based on the writing so far, that they can really do it well.

(I just surprised myself writing that! With American TV, I’m always like, "Oh, good. Another baby storyline." Or, "Oh, good. She left him for a dude." Or, "Oh, good. Zero gays." And now I’m like two months into Corrie and I’m like, "Oh, I hope the writers tackle this nuanced, difficult, supremely important thing because they are that awesome." Huh. How about that.)

Sophie asks to ring Sian, and Sophie’s dad agrees. Sophie’s mum gives him the stink-eye, and he goes, "She’s actually only ever made one mistake in her life and she just aced her exams; maybe we should let her off her leash so she can get some fresh air."

Sian agrees to come to the shop later, and so she does, whining a little about her exam results, but mostly using it as a segue to ask if she can be Sophie’s trophy girlfriend: "Promise me that when you’re like this rich business women, you’ll come and save me from the tills at Freshco." Sophie pinkie promises, which is the cutest thing — because Sian is hinting at the future and Sophie is hinting back. "Are you thinking about me and you beyond right this second?" "Yeah, I pinkie promise I am."

But is Freshco a real place? Is it like Tesco? Because the one thing I know about Tesco from my UK travels is that they have the best chocolate chip cookies IN THE WORLD OH MY GOD.