Jessica Lowndes explains “I Wish I Was Gay”

Before I even watched Jessica Lowndes music video for “I Wish I Was Gay,” I braced myself. The actress-turned-singer played gay for a few episodes on 90210 in 2009, but her character, Adrianna, later returned to guys. It’s arguable as to whether or not the character even considers herself bisexual or if her fling with Rumer Willis‘ Gia was a phase. So when Jessica put out the single, I was prepared for the worst.

Now, it could have been worse. I say this because I’ve been through this before with Katy Perry, and “I Kissed a Girl” was a phenomenon. Luckily, Jessica Lowndes is not blowing up the charts with a song about how being a lesbian would be easier because girls don’t hurt each other like guys hurt girls. (The number one signifier that Jessica is clearly straight if she thinks this is the truth.) But because I expected it to be kind of terrible and no one on the internet even seemed to care she released the video, I ignored it — until she started talking about it with The Huffington Post.

Jessica told HuffPo:

I wrote the song when I was going through a bad breakup, and I think it is something all girls can relate to. When they’ve gone through a bad breakup, they want to throw up their hands and say, “I wish I didn’t have to deal with this anymore.” We all say we wish we were a little gay.

It’s true that many straight women allege that being a lesbian would be “easier” but it isn’t. First, there’s that whole pesky “second class citizen” business you have to deal with, and that’s before you even realize that two women, one relationship can mean twice the amount of drama. (But, yes, also twice the fun.) It trivializes our relationships, like we don’t have the same feelings, problems or emotional turmoil that women in relationships with men do. It takes away from the idea that we are all the same, innately, as human beings, just trying to connect with one another.

At any rate, the use of lesbianism in a song and video all about getting revenge on a cheating boyfriend is just bad business. Plus, it’s tired! (See: Katy Perry.) Jessica says she doesn’t read any comments on the web because it’d make her to crazy, but I would love for someone to tell her (anyone at all) that wishing you were a lesbian isn’t going to help you find a better boyfriend, nor will it make the old one get wise and be a stand-up guy. Your time is better spent on other songs; or on acting.