There are less than 25 bars in the US that label themselves “lesbian bars” today. Cruising is a new podcast that records and reports these remaining lesbian bars. Three sapphic women – Sarah Gabrielli, Rachel Karp, and Jennifer McGinity – take off from NYC for one big, road-tripping, lesbian bar hop.
They’ll share their stories and interviews with bar owners, staff and community members with listeners, “[ultimately investigating] why these spaces are dwindling, why they are important, and what, if anything, is taking their place?”
I interviewed the women behind the podcast to get the deets.
Where it began…
So, how did they come up with the idea? “It was New Year’s Eve of 2020,” they said. “There had been a little bit of buzz about how few lesbian bars remained in the U.S., and Rachel had the crazy idea to visit them all and make a podcast. The three of us had been wanting to collaborate on a project like this for some time.
“Sarah and Rachel have known each other since highschool, and Rachel and Jen are dating. For a few months, the project remained a pipe-dream. And then we all got vaccinated and travel started to feel like a possibility again. So we started talking more seriously about the project: planning a month-long road-trip to visit each of these bars, scheduling interviews, etc.”
The trio had a thirst to find out what lesbian bars in unfamiliar places were like. “We wanted to know what these spaces looked like across the country–not just in hyper-liberal states like NY and California, but in Oklahoma and Texas and Alabama too. We wanted to know the stories of the humans that run these bars, and the humans that call them a home.”
They found that, despite assumption, less liberal states aren’t always less inclined to have lesbian bars. “There are more lesbian bars in more conservative states. For example, we went to 3 in Oklahoma and 2 in Texas, but Massachusetts and Vermont have none (that we know of).”
The discoveries didn’t stop there. The trio found that:
1. “Outside of New York, more of the bars we visited are more intergenerational communities.”
2. “A lot of lesbian bars make an effort to offer non-alcoholic drink options, even if it isn’t economically viable.”
3. “A lot of people told us that their lesbian bar feels like Cheers. Probably a dozen separate people said this.”
4. “…Even more people told us that their lesbian bar is not just a bar but a home.”
Why are lesbian bars dwindling?
The question of why lesbian bars are depleting began the trio’s journey. They believe that, after seeking to get to the root of the crisis, “not all the answers to this question are bad!”
The first reason they’ve found is that we have the option to intermingle without the same fears or exclusion we once experienced to a higher degree. “We don’t have to go to a lesbian bar to be ourselves and be safe,” they believe. “We can go just about anywhere. At one point in our country’s not so distant history, lesbian bars were the only places for women to be gay. Now we have gay dating apps, and gay sports leagues, and gay social media. So the lesbian bar is less essential.”
Another reason is the expectation or willingness for lesbian bars to become more inclusive – less lesbian-focused – which the women believe is a good thing. Lesbian bars become ‘gay bars’ or ‘queer spaces’ instead. I think for a lesbian bar to survive in 2021 it has to become less lesbian… and, therefore, extinct.
Gay men don’t have the same expectation for their bars to be inclusive, however. There are little to no lesbian bars in cities near me. Yet there are multiple gay bars that are either consistently “men only” or “men only” on certain nights. I don’t think we should take men-only nights away from gay men. I’d want to avoid bridesmaid parties attending drag shows and behaving like they’re at the zoo, too. But I know lesbians deserve and need their solo nights as well.
The last reason the trio gave for why they think lesbian bars are dwindling is about (possibly true) stereotypes. “We hear a lot that lesbians just don’t go out as much as men or straight couples. Which may be true to an extent, although it’s more complicated than the classic stereotype of the uhaul lesbian that settles down and stops partying.”
The financial disempowerment that a family or couple with two female incomes experiences is also something to consider. “The gender pay gap in America means that on average, a household of two gay men has significantly more disposable income than a household of two gay women.” Check out the Cruising Podcast here!
